Brokenness

He came, with the unit’s deputy walking behind him. He was holding a book with his left hand as he carefully placed a painful right hand, resting on top of the book.

“What happened?” I queried.

“I was practicing my karate chops this morning, Ma’am, when I woke up. I swung pretty hard and accidentally hit the metal frame of the bunk bed. I hit it so hard that my right hand feels so much pain. I’m scared to move it so I have this book to make it just rest on top,” he softly answered.

“I can see that, the moment you walked in. But…I don’t see any deformity nor swelling. There is also no bruising. So, I hope that it’s good,” I answered as I carefully palpated the radial pulse to make sure there was a good circulation flowing to the right hand. There was.

“Sir, since there’s no doctor at this time, I’m going to wrap your hand with a special dressing to support it and make it not move as much. It may hurt you as I do so. But when I get done, you will feel relief,” I reassured.

“Do what you have to do, Ma’am. I think it’s broken,” he said.

“I don’t think it is. I can’t tell you the symptoms when there is a fracture. But to be on the safe side, I will still put you for the doctor and it will be up to him to order an x-ray,” I uttered. [I don’t disclose symptoms to inmates because sometimes, they tend to come back and fake the severity of their illnesses or injuries and they start saying the symptoms if they are told].

After using an Ace-wrap bandage and giving him something for pain, he slowly got up…

“Thank you, Ma’am. Ahhh. You’re right, it does feel better. But I'm still gonna' use this book,” he replied as he smiled.

“Hope you feel better…I know you need the doctor if it is broken,” I responded.

We all practice our “karate chops”, too [self-reliance] but when we break our will as we face many trials, that’s when we realize we need the “Doctor” and we become totally dependent of Him. It seems like when God has a greater plan for a person, the greater the brokenness that occurs. The apostle Paul both endured great power along with great brokenness. But he never said that his “brokenness” was a punishment nor a failure. He asserted that his sufferings were a result of his service to Christ.

2 Corinthians 1:5 ~ “For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.” [ESV]

Blessings go with brokenness? That’s hard to take! How can we feel blessed while being broken at the same time? But all the pain, all the hurt brought about by a loss of loved ones, of divorce, of being trapped in substance abuse, of being financially broken, bring about that potential to discover the richness in living that otherwise, we would never know. It is through brokenness that we experience God’s greatest blessings…

It is only through brokenness that God’s power works in us. Our self-reliance is replaced with His desires and good intentions for us.

In the end, we discover spiritual maturity, a deeper relationship with God, His divine wisdom, more power to minister to others, strength, peace, etc…etc…

Lord, I’m broken!!! Ahhh…But You’re right. I feel better…Because of my brokenness, Your healing and restoration come forth…

Let us stop fixing our "brokenness" in our own terms. Let's bring it to Christ...

The Best Gift

1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,but have not love, I gain nothing.

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

~ 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 [NIV]

Give the Best Gift you can give to yourself and others...Jesus. He is love. For God is love.

His love and grace can break any barrier. Can bring light to the darkest places. Can wipe sorrows with joys. Can change ashes to beauty. Can bring life to what is dead.

This is the only change we all can believe in...Nothing else...





Praying that you all will have the most meaningful celebration of Love this year. May God bless and protect us all.

Urgent Prayer Request

This was posted at sister Denise's blogs: [Her husband needs our prayers]...Please pray for sister Denise, too.

Free To Be Me

Shorty Bear's Place

Prayers Go Up, Blessings Come Down

Eddie has had a stroke and is in hospital under observation. They were unable to get the stroke medication in time. So far they have done a CAT scan and a MRI and other test are being awaiting . His leg is effected. He is able to speak. This is written at 9:30 p.m. TN timeHe is in Memorial Hospital Chattanooga TN. She is alone so if any friends are able please cons ider coming to her side. He is being moved to room momentarily.

Waiting Upon The Lord

“But why do you call me when you can’t give me my insulin now anyway?” bickered one of the female insulin-dependent diabetics.

“Oh, Ms. R. I don’t know why you keep getting upset when you already know for a while now that our doctor had specifically ordered for nurses not to give your insulin if your food is not there yet in your unit. You know that your insulin works within minutes. We don’t want your blood sugar to bottom out. That’s very risky to give it to you. Yes, we’re doing it now, because all the diabetics come to be tested at this time and yours is not an exception,” I answered.

She went to one of the plastic chairs inside the waiting area and still with a sour face, tried to focus on the morning news being shown from the tv set.

“Just wait…patiently. As soon as I hear that your chow is on its way to your unit, I will give your shot right away and will send you back to your unit, okay?”

Not wanting to smile, she let out a forced, “Thank you, Ma’am”….

This morning, as I was waking up, it seemed as if the Lord was etching the word “wait” in my heart. As I try to gather my thoughts now and as I consult the Lord about this, I found asking myself on “why is it always hard for us to wait?”

Our hearts often always seem to be crying in agony. We feel oppressed. Rejected. Constrained. We yearn for freedom and provision. We pray for miracles and wait. We pray for a spouse, a job, for healing, for wisdom, for ministry and other things. Sometimes, we think the spiritual enemy is tempting us. True at times but sometimes, it may be God testing us for He wants for us to draw nearer to Him.

Waiting is a crucial step. As we face a mountain of trials, our weaknesses emerge. And at this point, our hearts become desperate, our faith is proven and our hope is purified.

Just like that helpless inmate waiting for my “call”, waiting upon the Lord are those times when we have limited or no resources even, no answers, no directions. We are most of the time, confused, poor, broken-hearted and limited. But if we live by confidence with our own sources and abilities, won’t we become self-confident? What glory will it bring to God?

Yes, waiting is hard but in this process, God enables us to depend on Him so that we may know and realize that it’s only Him Who does wonderful things in our lives.

Waiting upon God…Protects us…Deepens our trust in Him…Forces us to seek His ways…Brings Him the most glory…

…“but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” ~ Isaiah 40:31




Let us patiently wait then….But look Who’s been waiting patiently, too for us to draw nearer to Him:

All posts/composed songs copyright by RCUBEs.



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