My family and I had sailed stormy seas these past two weeks. My son did not expect the sudden change of weather as he just started to set his sail and embarked on pursuing his passion in a school he thought would give him the best opportunity. He did very well during the first quarter. But when the next came, there was a sudden shift with the wind and became rougher the more he tried to steady his boat of college life. The stronger waves of confusion tried to shake him and caused a lot of fears and worries. The soft winds of the adviser's words were a disguise to the threatening howls of vague instructions that created a poor vision and sapped my son's energy and love for Graphic Design. Poor vision was what he saw, instead of clear, smooth horizon.
We had a lot of talking. In the morning. Noon. Midnight. All the in-betweens. We tried to gather our remaining hope and kept on praying for God to increase our faith and remove the darts of confusion aimed at my son. Like a weary child inside God's armor, many times my son rested his head on my shoulder and that of my husband's.
"It's okay to cry. But you will never know how much more it hurts us," I whispered, paired with countless hugs and kisses. Of unconditional love. Fiery reassurances.
Saw a rainbow while driving once |
Do you know how good it feels that no matter what age, your child or a loved one can literally rest their heads on your shoulders? I know as he does that, I can feel his burden lightening up. And though it causes more pain on my part, I know through those warm tears, healing starts.
I have to be honest. There were a couple of times I told my son that I didn't know how much longer I could be strong for him. But each moment I surrendered to a quiet time of prayer, I knew I would always be strong. My husband would always be strong. My son would be strong and remained so.
Because there is a Shoulder Who is always welcoming us when we need that to cry on. Whose Voice is always calling to cast our anchors in the deep and vast ocean of His mercy. Who is the Beacon for all those lost out on the open, rough seas.
Have you tried leaning your head on His Shoulders? On Jesus' shoulders?