In my quiet time with the Lord, I asked Him to talk to me and help me get rid of this poisonous anger. God is awesome! He surely showed me His loving embrace through His Word. He let me know that letting go of anger was surely the best thing to do and which would please Him in return.
He told me from Romans 12:17-19, 21 - "Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Do your part to live in peace with everyone, as much as possible. Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God. Don't let evil get the best of you, but conquer evil by doing good."
To God be the glory! I felt something heavy got lifted off my chest...and felt that no matter who hurts me or breaks my heart, God is always there for me, loving me, comforting me, and setting an example to still love others, even the worst of my enemies...Thank You Lord!
Joy is not something we get from material things. True joy comes from knowing God. It all starts with having a personal relationship with God. It all starts with the knowledge how much God loves us all. And not until we experience that kind of love, we will not experience true "joy". As we try to have a closer walk with God, then, we are bound to discover that He remains unchanging and that His love never ends. From 1John 4:19, "we love because He first loved us." Joy goes beyond "happiness" as it remains even in the midst of "unhappiness". Rooted in God's love, it is a deeper sense of stability even when things around us go wrong.
"In Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forever more..."-Psalm 16:11..
Before 6am, that's the usual time when all the night crew gets caught up with all the busyness and chaos, so it's usually more calm and that's when we try to get reenergized prior to accuchecks.
The incoming day charge nurse walked in, finding us, sitting and with all the calmness around us, commented, "you guys should be doing something instead of just sitting around." No amount of explanation would change her mind, her way of thinking that we were just idle. I felt my blood pressure go higher because I felt it wasn't right for her to assume that we were not busy at all when we just got done with all the work.
Things here in this world a lot of times are not fair. Sometimes, there is double standard. Your effort doesn't get noticed. You don't get thanked for something you have done beyond your means...You're not accepted. You're not respected...Didn't men do all these with the Lord Jesus? That's how it is here in this world.
I stepped out of the front door with a new positive outlook. I wasn't planning on ruining my new day with someone's false accusation. I took a deep breath and deep inside felt good, knowing that God is there Who sees everything. He's the One I always want to please with whatever I'm doing. He is my "BOSS". He is the One Who knows I put my heart in things that I do at work because He knows how much I treasure this job He gave me. He knows how much I appreciate this "blessing" when I found it after my neck injury...Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men."
I don't need to explain anything because I know He is always fair. From 2 Chronicles 19:7, "Now let the fear of the LORD be upon you. Judge carefully, for with the LORD our God there is no injustice or partiality or bribery."
The Attacker (5/15/09)
The sun was just peeking from the Eastern skies.
Out in the prison’s yard, some huge Sheriff’s buses were illuminated by the soft glow coming from the lights all over from the tall lamp posts. Their engines were turned on, warming up, before the buses would take the inmates to the different courts where they would have their trials.
Orange-uniformed men were lined up in pairs, joined together with handcuffs and chained, forming a long line. They already had their breakfast and had their morning medications prior to going to courts. Some were fidgeting, as they waited to board those buses.
All of a sudden, all hell broke loose! Two men were engaged in a fight, using weapons they made secretly for a while. Deputies called for help on the radio, both for custody back-up and medical staff, as well.
When the air was cleared and the other inmates were secured, one man was down on the floor. He sustained multiple gashes but two of them were deep. One cut was vertically etched from his left ear going down to the jaw line. The other dangerous cut was horizontal on his left neck, close to the jugular vein. Pool of blood dripped all over the floor. Holding his bleeding neck, he was pointing at the other inmate few feet away, being guarded by the other deputies.
The other man being accused was not hurt. There were no lacerations nor any other signs of trauma. He was obviously very agitated as he was being questioned by those deputies, while the medical staff started treating the other man on the floor. They cleaned the wounds and controlled the bleeding. That man was sent to the nearby hospital.
When the investigation was finalized, it turned out to be that the “downed man who was accusing the other inmate” was the attacker and the other one who didn’t have injury was the one attacked. The deputies found out that it was the second attempt to attack the unhurt man. Both attacks on him failed. He was well-prepared after the first attempt on him, that when the second attempt was done, he was able to defend himseld and ended up injuring his attacker severely.
[Source: Life Application Bible]:
We also have an “accuser of the brethren.” Satan and his army of demons are the enemies of God and of everything good.
“Because God’s children are human beings – made of flesh and blood – Jesus also became flesh and blood by being born in human form. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the Devil, who had the power of death.” –Hebrews 2:14
Because of what Jesus had done [dying on the cross], we, who live in constant fear of death shouldn’t be afraid anymore. Jesus had freed us from that fear so we can live for Him. When we belong to God, we know that death is only the portal that leads into “eternal life”. [“Thank You Lord!].
Paul warned us, too that we also battle against the evil forces of Satan, who is a vicious fighter. But to be able to withstand their attacks, we must depend on God’s strength and use every piece of His armor. We face an army whose goal is to defeat Christ’s church. When we believe in Christ, they become our enemies. They will try any device to turn us away from the Lord.
Fear not! For God has provided His supernatural power to defeat Satan and his army, through His Holy Spirit within us. So, arm yourselves with God’s armor.
Let us be strong in the Lord's mighty power. Let's put on His whole armor to resist the enemy's attacks: put on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God's righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that we are well-prepared. We will need faith in every battle as our shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed by Satan and his army. Let us put on salvation as our helmet, not forgetting the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. Let's pray at all times, on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. We must stay alert and be persistent in our prayers for all Christians everywhere. [Ephesians 6:10-18].