“Guess he was having seizures,” reported a unit deputy over
the phone. As I struggled to finish some doctor’s orders in the computer with
the goal of having more done during the 4 ½ hours I came for to help the night
crew.
He was a heavy set man. Ambulating only with a wheelchair.
His salt and pepper beard and disheveled hair catching my attention as his
mouth was endlessly talking with the young unit deputy who wheeled him in into
the Clinic. With my gloved hands, I held the chart close to me and led him to
the hallway where the vital signs monitor was waiting.
Rubbing a slightly red cut on the bottom of his dry lips, he
uttered, “My cellmate tried to catch me, Ma’am. I don’t know. Guess I was
having a seizure. I don’t remember much.”
He proceeded…
“I don’t like Dilantin and they’re not giving me the meds
that I want. It should be Depakote.”
Addressing the first statement, I replied, “Your cut looks
old. That’s not a fresh injury. What caused your cut because it’s not from a
fall.”
He acted like he didn’t understand me but managed to reply, “Ahhh…I
was tasered outside. I got hit there…”
“Okay, Sir…So, that’s not from the fall. It was an injury
during your arrest. Though it’s slightly red, it seems to be healing.”
“Now, give me a few minutes. Let me review the medication
form they have in the pharmacy and I’ll get back with you…”
Holding the tan envelope with his name and all the
medications he was being given, I showed it to him.
“See this? What does it say on the last label?”
“Depakote…”
“Sir, I can tell you now. You didn’t have a seizure (his
face was painted with a surprised look as if I didn’t know what I was saying).
You thought you had one or you just plainly couldn’t remember. But here you are
talking with me appropriately and demanding for a medication you want when it
has been ordered and being given to you.”
His mouth opened as if he wanted to say something but no
words came out.
“Well…Is it okay for me to stay a little bit here?” he asked
as the Infirmary Deputy behind him loudly yelled “No!” in protest when he heard
the conversation between us.
“No!” I finally answered.
“There is no medical emergency and no good reason for you to
be here in the Clinic. You know that in true emergencies, all you have to do is
press that button (in his cell) and if you’re not able, I know your cellmate
will and your unit’s bubble (control room).”
The tall Clinic Deputy turned his wheelchair facing the
first metal door that would open to the hallway leading to his unit. He was
visibly upset as this inmate was down in the Clinic for different reasons not
warranting any medical intervention. Night after night... He denied that he was having a problem in
his unit when I asked him. I had no choice but to send him back. Glancing at
them, I knew…He would return…
How many times people whine, forgetting the availability of
God’s grace? Instead of pressing on with prayers, they impatiently want the answers
for the things they want their way instead of surrendering to what He best
planned. That in so doing (whining or complaining), it does nothing but makes a
situation not even better. Instead of thanking Him , many hearts lose to see the
truth. That in trials, both with answered and unanswered prayers, He is always
there. Those hearts fail to see the good outcome in store when they whine and
start looking at the negatives. Backs end up turned on Him instead of sinful lives.
But in reality,
Jesus is “only a prayer away.” Anytime. Anywhere. He is not far. When prayers
are not answered, the wretched heart should ponder…
How far has he walked away from Jesus or how much things of
this world is polluting that heart? If you find out the answer, maybe it’s time…To
go back to Jesus, to seek Him and truly tell Him what’s ailing that heart. To
allow that heart to cry out the true emergency…Of needing God’s forgiveness.
"I'm With You Always" (a song He gave me on July 23, 2004)
When you feel the weight of the world
And you have no one to help you in any way
You may not know, you may not feel
I've loved you from the start, I always will
I'm with you always...you're never alone
I'm always by your side...no matter the season
I'm with you always...keep this thought with you
Just call on Me, I'm always here...I'm always here...for you
You may be heartbroken but I'm Someone you can trust
You may fall on your knees, just reach out for My Hand
You may cry every tear, I will wipe them dry
You may feel just existing, but I can give you life...
"I'm With You Always" (a song He gave me on July 23, 2004)
When you feel the weight of the world
And you have no one to help you in any way
You may not know, you may not feel
I've loved you from the start, I always will
I'm with you always...you're never alone
I'm always by your side...no matter the season
I'm with you always...keep this thought with you
Just call on Me, I'm always here...I'm always here...for you
You may be heartbroken but I'm Someone you can trust
You may fall on your knees, just reach out for My Hand
You may cry every tear, I will wipe them dry
You may feel just existing, but I can give you life...
