Who among the gods is like you, LORD? Who is like you--
majestic in holiness, awesome in glory, working wonders? – Exodus 15:11 (NIV)
I haven’t blogged. For a while now. It’s not because I don’t
want to. But more of a hunger for a retreat. Away from all circumstances going
on around me. In the world. In the country. In the county. In the city where I
live. I haven’t worked as much either. So I have lesser contacts with potential
patients who are incarcerated. Lesser contacts with co-workers who might or
might not like each other. Yet…
I will never stop conversing with God. Daily. It will be
foolish to take even a minute break away from Him.
So…I pray everyone is doing well. I perceive. Each one of us
is always walking in different depths of the valleys in our journeys. But God
has promised. He will never leave nor forsake those who love Him.
I glanced at the calendar. Always surprised that another
year had gone by. Another month, well, couple of months by now, had slipped
like sand through my fingers. It was time to see my primary doctor for routine
follow ups of my blood pressure as I have a history of high blood pressure.
He knew. My BP readings have been normal at home. But for
weird reasons, the readings were always up whenever I went to his office. The
nurse was baffled that my BP would be high then would go down by a few points
with a split second of her re-pumping the cuff. I never believed in “white coat
syndrome.” I often told them as they smiled, making sure I was completely
asymptomatic every time the reading was opposite to my usual good, fun mood.
White coat syndrome is a condition where a person’s blood pressure
is elevated in clinical settings but not somewhere else. Like mine. High there.
Normal at home.
“I’m not even nervous. But I admit,” I told the nurse… “I
often think about how high it would be by the time I was leaving home to see
them.”
Despite attempting some relaxation techniques with a few minutes to spare in
my car, the BP was high. Last week though, even though it was high, it was a
much better reading compared to the past ones.
I had my doctor for many years. He knew me. If any symptoms,
I was always quick to either phone him or make an effort to see him right away.
Feeling more relaxed as I got home after that follow up
appointment, I took another BP reading. It was normal and way low compared to
what was obtained at the doctor’s office. I knew…There has to be anxiety
involved deep in me though I might not feel nervous at all.
It is scary. To think that there are no possible symptoms
for a person who has high blood pressure. A lot of times, such symptoms are
caught when it is time for a doctor’s physical exam.
I can’t imagine myself. A sinner. Who needs a constant
follow up by the Greatest Physician Whose white Light is pure. There as I wait
in peace and quiet, I know things I might not be aware of that can harm me will
be exposed in His light.
I am grateful for my doctor who is concerned with my health
problems. And I am so much more grateful for my Physician, my Healer Who is
always reminding me that not all things outside of His place are always
beneficial for my spiritual health.
