Choice

Wow…I couldn’t believe we had a quiet night this past weekend at work. It was just the usual paper works that we were accustomed to. Not too many sick calls. Then, the interruption…

“Good morning. Clinic. May I help you?,” asked our medical secretary. Her voice echoing in the waves of peace that blanketed that area.

“He is? Chest pain? Can your deputies bring him down here? Okay…Thanks…I’ll let the nurses here know,” as she ended the conversation with the deputy from one of the housing units.

Reviewing the chart, we found out that the inmate was still in his early 20’s, unlikely to have cardiac problems [except for congenital cases or other conditions precipitated by injuries]. There were no other recorded medical problems from the past since he was incarcerated.

One hour had passed and as I was readying myself to see the inmate, another call came in from that unit.

“No? What did you guys do that he is cured just like that? You guys are awesome!,” jokingly, the secretary uttered.

“Excuse me, nurse RCUBES. That inmate was told that it would cost him $3.00. All of a sudden, he told the deputies that he was okay and did not really need to go to the clinic.”

“Oh, okay. Thanks for letting me know. I’m just here so if he changes his mind again, I’ll see him,” smilingly I replied.

Most of the inmates faking their conditions or not, get upset to find out that they need to shell out $3 from their accounts, as a cost for being seen and treated when they request a medical attention. Whether they have the money or not, their requests are never denied as some cases actually turn out to be to worth being assessed and treated.


Boy, aren’t we like that? Got hesitant when we heard that we have to shell out our worldly ways in exchange of a life given to be renewed by the Savior. But this treatment wouldn’t cost a thing. He paid for it all, in order for us to live a life of freedom. Freedom from sins. It cost Him his life so we can live.

Just like our Infirmary being opened 24/7 in that correctional facility, His offer of hope, eternal future, of physical and spiritual healing, of starting your slate clean and smudge-free from sins, is always available!

The only thing left is for you to make that choice whether you want to be renewed or not….Yes, it does seem that we are giving up a lot when we surrender everything to Jesus. But I guarantee, your life wouldn’t be the same as you accept His gift of grace. Because you will start walking on the only right path toward living a joyful life…..that no matter what you encounter in your life’s journey, He is always right beside you…

He desires a personal relationship with us….He is offering His love, forgiveness, grace, mercy in exchange of your worldly things that do not have value. So, what’s the state of your personal spiritual account? Full or bankrupt? You make a choice…Because doing so is also His gift…


Isaiah 55:1-13 [The Message]

Spiritual Sundays - I Will Wait For You

"Cancer is a word, not a sentence." ~ John Diamond

"The most important thing in illness is never to lose heart." ~ Nikolai Lenin

"Feed your faith and your fears will starve to death." ~ Unknown

"I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains." ~ Anne Frank

"Hope never abandons you, you abandon it." ~ George Weinberg

"Every evening I turn my worries to God. He's going to be up all night long anyway." ~ Mary C. Crowley


I had composed this song on April 7, 2005, in memory of my sister-in-law's father who died from cancer. A year later, my own father was diagnosed with colon cancer and lived until December 2007. That was a difficult journey to walk on, but it was the Lord Who comforted my father, my siblings and myself. These 2 verses came to mind as I composed this song:

Philippians 4:19 ~ "You will meet all our needs according to Your glorious riches in Christ Jesus."

Isaiah 40:31~ "But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint..."

I Will Wait For You

I feel my strength is gone day to day
My heart is broken and the pain never goes away
What I'm going through, others will not see
Deep inside, I know that I'll find my strength......in You

Chorus:

My hope is in You 'cause You're the One
You stay beside me when I'm all alone
You always mend this broken heart
Lord, I'll wait for You 'til You hold my hands

I'm not afraid whatever comes my way
In my heart, Your Spirit's here to stay
I will close my eyes now so I can pray
May Your will be done as I wait for You....everyday

[repeat Chorus...]

rcubes 4/07/05

Please visit Spiritual Sundays for other uplifting posts...This is a special place hosted by sisters Charlotte and Ginger where other bloggers for Jesus gather and you can even join in if you feel led to do so....God bless you all.

Look At Me

“Do you mind seeing this inmate complaining of side pain?”, asked the charge nurse.

“Not at all,” I replied.

A young male walked into the door, holding the back part of his right side, slightly limping and grimacing in obvious pain. Before I had the chance to start asking him, a per diem LVN walked up to the big window and started asking the inmate some questions, wanting to help me in a way.

“So what’s up? You’re so young to be hurting like this. What’s wrong with you?”

“I have a history of having kidney stones,” was the reply.

“You? Kidney stones? Who diagnosed you? So, you come here to jail to get the treatment, right?” continued my co-worker.

The inmate slightly raised his voice, in an obvious upset tone, “No! I don’t come here to be treated. I don’t even need any narcotic. But this hurts. You don’t understand.”

The LVN gave him a cup as I directed and I tested it for urinalysis. It was positive for blood. I took that opportunity to take over in seeing the inmate. I let him in and had him sit on a chair. But his anger was already erupting.

“You guys tell me that I’m lying or what? That I come here to get drugs for pain?,” he mumbled under his breath, his head bowed low.

I couldn’t blame him. For I was upset, too with what I just witnessed in that exchange of conversation. Upset at my co-worker.

“Sir, look at me…” I requested.

He continued to mumble with his angry rants.

“Sir, please look at me.” This time, he did and looked at me eye to eye.

“I can’t speak for everyone’s behavior here. But I want to apologize for whatever inappropriate behavior my co-worker had shown with you. I need you to listen to me. Because I do believe you’re in pain. I believe that you have kidney stones. And I want to help you to the best that I can.”

Pause…Sigh…Then, he uttered, “Thank you, Ma’am. For believing in me,” as he started wincing in pain.

“I am going to send you to the hospital because you do need to be examined there to see how bad the stones are. At least, they can also help you with your pain control. But I need you to just be patient during the whole process. We have to wait for the deputy to take you there.”

“I can wait, Ma’am. Thank you so much for your help.” He got up and went back to the waiting area.

I pulled my charge nurse away from her desk and talked with her privately. I told her I wanted to confront the LVN for that inappropriate behavior. But I believed it would help if she was the one to address the issue and warn not only him [the LVN], but also the rest of the staff. It was not our duty to judge the inmates. No matter how bad they were, it was our duty to help them with their medical problems and not be concerned with their social backgrounds. The other consequence was that inmates could retaliate by hurting staff if embarassed that way...She understood and immediately talked with the LVN.

After many hours, the inmate returned, smiling now and more trusting. He thanked me. I looked at the discharge paperworks that came from the hospital. The diagnosis was kidney stones. They had to give him something strong for pain and wanted him to be followed up in a few days.



I don’t know about you for whatever circumstances you have gone through that you distanced yourself from God. I don’t know what life has thrown at you that you think God doesn’t care. He doesn’t listen. He is too far away. He doesn’t love you….But friends, feeling that way is dangerous. Because we cannot measure God with human kind of standards. The truth is…God loves us all. He is always listening and He is always ever near.

Is it right to be angry at God? The answer is “no”…That is being proud for sinful creatures to disapprove of what God allows and does.

Yes, it’s okay to express your anger to God but it’s wrong to stay angry…He is waiting for you to “look at Him”. He wants a relationship with you. When you hold a grudge against Him, the more the distance between you and God widens. Guess who’ll suffer in the end?

He Loves Us No Matter What

I couldn’t wait until this day comes that I am writing about my son’s healing. The waiting period was long and often times, painful but I’m so glad, it’s all over!


His doctor gave him this whole week to just rest and regain his strength back. He doesn’t have any more headaches. The dizziness was gone. He started eating with what seemed to be his normal appetite yesterday. Bad for me! Because I’m eating with him! I didn’t even realize I had lost weight because when he was in pain, I forgot to eat.


When it comes to our children, it is always hard to see them suffer. I told him if there was a way I could take that pain away, I would. But sometimes, we all go through that trial, because that’s when we realize that we are truly in need of God. And that, when he is healed, even better for him not to forget God especially during the good times.


My son had gone through so much with all the pain and the medical tests but he remained patient and learned to endure. He never complained nor whined. I feel so blessed to see him prayed at times, which gave me comfort in return. And which reminded me, that no matter what happened at that time, the Lord was always just a “prayer” away.


And this trial made us, three, even more close to each other. Even if we are aware that our lives are like flickering candles, the more we value each day that the Lord gives…Don’t forget to hug your children, give them a kiss, and say “I love you” over and over. Same with your spouses. Live each day as if it’s your last…because that will help you focus on what matters the most….


So, this post is to thank you all who prayed for us as we met this bump on this road. We appreciate your love and friendships. And most of all, all the thanks and praise to our Father Who hurts Himself when His children are suffering. He knows…He’s been there before. His suffering that none of us had experienced…And He submitted Himself to be nailed on the cross out of love for us….Thank You Jesus…


May we remain prayerful, not only when we have hurdles to overcome…but in all occasions. Let's keep those who are also in need of prayers because when we agree together, He is surely in the midst of us...God bless you all and love to you all.