Difficult People

 

“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” (Galatians 5:22-23)

This man who asked my friend why I was visiting at the hospital when I wasn’t a family member came rushing past towards me and my car I had just backed in, into my friend’s driveway so we could unload the stuff I had shopped for her. I always offered before visiting so to lighten her load on her, caring alone for her aged mother and knowing how difficult it was for her to go get supplies they needed as she couldn’t leave her mother alone. From the tense moment of me not saying “Hi” verbally the last time to just motioning my hand, I knew he was baffled why I didn’t acknowledge his presence as much at that time. This time, I felt he was waiting for my reaction upon seeing him. 

“Hi ‘T”,” I finally let out from my mouth. He said "hello" back but continued walking in a fast pace up the sloping driveway. To my contentment as I was the type not great with hiding feelings or emotions. I would say things as they were, whether they would hurt or not. 

That has been my struggle. To find honest or sincere people. To feel genuine love and care from others. When they ask me questions, either they are just curious or like to compare. If not, to make me well aware that they are better than me. It’s not only from people I meet. People I used to work with. Friends. Worst of all, these individuals can also come from my own family. Or that of my husband’s.

Many times I cry out in prayers for the Lord to show me ways in dealing with such people. But also starting with my own heart. To always probe my heart and cut what doesn't belong there... There are times that even if it hurts too much, I have to cut a relationship. Not as an escape. But for my own health and sanity. I have learned that those people who knowingly or unknowingly cause pain don’t care and I am the one on the receiving end who gets wounded despite me showing genuine love and care. I always seek the Lord’s guidance for I know that whatever I do, it will only be effective if they are done with His grace. At times, I have put boundaries either by staying away from such “toxic people” and if I can't stay away from them, I just don’t give in to their manipulative ways. But what relief!!!

I always ask the Lord to help me deal with true love that comes from Him, patience and how I need His grace! 

How do you deal with difficult people?

2019 Prayer

 

Lord, another year is here. Though there will be uncertainties, give us courage and increase our faith, knowing that with faith and trust in You, then, there's no room for fear and worries no matter what comes our way. I believe Your faithful and true promises to always be there with us up to the end of the age. Guide us Lord and give us Your discernment especially in these times where there are many spiritual deceptions. For Your ways and thoughts are higher than ours. Expose the lies in our lives under Your light and help us commit our ways to You, Lord. To live holy lives as You command for You are a Holy God!

Thank You Lord for the hope You give us in this dark place. For shining Your Light to show us the narrow path that leads to salvation. For being the Way to eternal life. For being our Everything knowing that apart from You, we truly are nothing.

Help us Lord this year to overcome any unseen obstacles that come our way in our journey. Thank You Lord for loving us first. Thank You for Your love, grace, and mercy. Help me Lord to reflect Your light in everything that I say or do. Remind me that the best New Year's resolution I can have is to love You first. To seek You first each day. I love You Lord. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

Open Your Heart

May you open your heart to a Savior constantly knocking at its door. Merry Christmas!

The Season of Giving

                                                         

My son and I scoured the aisles at a local Walmart to find the shorter lines of customers about to pay. 

“Let’s count and make sure we only have 20 items so we can just go to the Express lanes,” I uttered.There were only three people ahead if we qualified.

“Yes!,” my son exclained. “20!”

The last one was a lady wearing a vest with the Walmart logo. She was probably getting something small and was taking her break. Turning around, she talked to me and requested, “Would you please save my spot? I just need to get a drink really quick!”

“Sure! No problem!,” I responded, as I stood still despite her leaving a big gap between me and the person ahead of her. Other people were already curiously looking. Perhaps, not hearing her request, wondering why I didn’t advance my cart.

Coming back, she proudly held a big can of a cold coffee with extra shots.

“Thank you so much! I just needed this!,” she said with a big smile on her weary face.

Anticipating a few more minutes waiting time, the line hardly moved despite it being the express lanes. 

 

“Busy!,” I told the lady.

She replied, “It’s hard to predict. Actually, this is nothing. Sometimes, it’s slower, then late at night, that’s when it hits us again.” Standing still while facing me, I was surprised when she kept talking and told me that her daughter had passed away and that she left a granddaughter that now she was taking care of.

“I love her to death! She looks exactly like my daughter…”

“I’m so sorry for your loss. But I’m glad you’re there to look after your granddaughter.”

“Well, the dad sometimes doesn’t take full responsibility. I’m not mean but I have to say something to him to take his part and not just let others take care of her daughter. Sometimes, I feel I’ve been taken advantage of…”

“I’m sure  it’s not easy for you to confront him. But you know what’s best for your granddaughter. I’m sure it makes a difference if her father gets involved.”

“Sometimes, it hurts that my own family seems like strangers to me than friends,” I continued. “So I have changed my point of view. Being blood-related sometimes doesn’t mean a thing if we belong to God’s family, doesn’t that count as families? That we can consider others our own families because that’s what God wants anyway.. is for us to help each other out if we are in His family…”  I saw her nodding her head a few times in agreement. In the corner of my eyes, I saw others’ reactions. Of wonderment why this stranger, a lady who worked at a local Walmart and this paying customer, a middle-aged woman with just 20 items in her cart could have possibly shared life’s stories in a little over 5 minutes in that line.

“Happy Holidays, you guys!” she said loudly after paying for her drink and other items.

“Merry Christmas!,” my son and I hollered as she continued to walk away and savor that short break to enjoy the energy boosting drink.

I told my son… I didn’t know the reason why we talked that way. Many people, I knew might be wearing big smiles on their faces. But deep inside, what was hidden was unbearable pain, unhealed wounds, hopelessness, faithlessness, and feeling of being rejected.

This is the Season of giving. Many around us are truly suffering. Shall we be limited only to helping out our families? Who around us are truly in need, if not of physical things but much more those who have deep voids in their hearts?” Sometimes, a simple acknowledgement of their existence by saying a sincere “Hello” or “Thank You” might mean the world to them. People worry about changing lifestyles to combat climate change when the real change needed is the condition of the hearts. Many people easily get offended by words and try to correct and mask them with words that might seem coated with peace, love and kindness. But the very same people who are offended are the ones who hurt others with actions and words. True peace, love and kindness can only be emitted from a heart changed by God’s grace. It is a gift from God.