Step Forward

“For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” –Jeremiah 29:11 (NLT)


These people in higher positions I had been battling with had some plans in progress again. Though I had discerned long time ago what they truly wanted for me which was to quit or resign my position ever since I had requested to remain working part-time, they never seemed to stop trying to intimidate me.

I visited the county Human Resources webpage and there it was again. They had opened another position for a Per Diem Nurse, when the other Per Diems and myself were not able to work lately because of the Nursing Manager’s action of pooling the other nurses back into our main prison that made it adequately staffed.

I could feel “anger” starting to surface in my heart. It was that kind that always sought for justice and for these evil plans to cease. It was that type that wanted a fair treatment and wanting an honest response from them. I never got those. But no matter how they tried to deceive me, the Lord had already shown into my heart that it would be okay, no matter how much these people would plan, He got it covered! Except….I needed to be patient and I needed to remain trusting on His plans instead!

The poisonous “anger” that made my heart in racing pulses began to slow down as I glanced at the unopened mail that came yesterday.

I saw this white envelope that came from a Christ-centered university offering some degree programs for nurses and other Sciences. What was printed on the back of top flap caught my eyes:

“To the angel of the church in Philadelphia write: These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open.” (Revelation 3:7) ~ (emphasis was mine)

His truth immediately coated and overwhelmed the ugly kind of anger stirring up in my heart. This growing anger could have become selfish on my part and seemed to distort His goal in my life. It would have boiled over if not for His restraint. He did tell me that I would not be able to avoid being angry sometimes, except I must learn to deal with it properly.

I love being a Nurse. A Correctional Nurse where He placed me 11 years ago. Because of God’s continued reassurance through His faithful promises, I know that there is nothing that happens in my life that He has no control of. Those people might think they have been harming me to force me to quit. They will never know (maybe they will God-willing) that God always directs someone’s steps (Proverbs 16:9).

It is not them. It is all up to me to choose what God’s call is in my life. If He put me in Correctional before after getting hurt at the hospital I worked for 10 years as an Orthopedic Nurse, I know that He can bring me somewhere else if I choose to follow His leading. If He wants me to stay working in the prison, so be it. Their plans might make me step back three times but God always appear and makes me be able to step forward miles and miles farther ahead. For when we are weak, because of God, we truly are strong!

No matter how hard my enemies try to pursue and scare me, their tactics will not work because of God's faithful promise as I continue to take a step toward the other end of this "Red Sea" I'm walking on.

“Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.” - Exodus 14:13,14 (NIV)


I choose to take that step forward Lord, no matter how hard it takes...because of You!

Trick and Threat!

I visited my friend yesterday. Two of her next-door neighbors were busy up on the roof putting up some spotlight to highlight what they had displayed in front of their gravel lawn. Some figures mimicking ghosts and other scary things. I looked around and saw others with spider webs dangling from the front arches of their entry yards. One black figure stood out among the front yards with glowing eyes which got even more creepy as the sun went down. A real black cat gazed from a distance as it kept staring at the glowing eyes but immovable figure. Candies were out as we decided to go to a nearby Target store.

“Wow!” my friend exclaimed… “The candy aisles were emptied out!”

People get busy when Halloween comes. They love to follow this old tradition. Just because… Even if many of them do not understand the origin.

“Trick or treat!” is what comes out from the mouths who love to go door to door and expect candies to be handed over to their bags, as they wear different costumes. Parents watching from a distance to keep an eye on their little ones hungry to get more candies or treats and hoping for their bags to be filled with goodies.

As my family and I accepted the Lord Jesus, this tradition was one among the things He wanted us to purge as we prayed for Him to show us things in our lives that would never please Him. I don’t remember how long now but we never turn on the front light to give a cue that we are not interested to participate in this tradition. It’s not these people’s fault. It is their lack of knowledge.

“My people are destroyed from lack of knowledge.” – Hosea 4:6 (NIV)

As believers we are not to compromise with what we believe in. We are to please God not men.  Jesus said that no one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other (Matthew 6:24).

Some things we allow in our lives that may seem harmless or insignificant may not be necessary true in our spiritual lives. In its truest sense, it could be disastrous!

“Trick or treat?”

No…thank you… It is “trick and threat!” A real threat to one’s soul…

“Don't be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell.” – Matthew 10:28 (NLT)

Lord, empower us with your Spirit and give us Your gift of discernment. Help us see things through Your eyes. Help us remove things that hinder our walk with You. Help us get rid of things that do not please You. Please open people's hearts and minds for them to know the truth that comes from You. As for us who have already been found by You, may we draw nearer to You and know more things about You. Thank You Lord for Your love, mercy and grace. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

The New Bed

 “¹³ All these great people died in faith. They did not get the things that God promised his people, but they saw them coming far in the future and were glad. They said they were like visitors and strangers on earth.¹⁴ When people say such things, they show they are looking for a country that will be their own.¹⁵ If they had been thinking about the country they had left, they could have gone back.¹⁶ But they were waiting for a better country—a heavenly country. So God is not ashamed to be called their God, because he has prepared a city for them.” – Hebrews 11:13-16 (NCV)

My son got sick since Tuesday. Typical. Seasonal allergy that bogged him down when the Santa Ana winds visited the canyon passes and the valleys, accompanied with the dropping humidity. From what we learned from his past seasonal attacks, he learned well to prepare well-ahead by trying to increase his fluid intake as he could tolerate and by taking his organic allergy pills.

“Rest! As soon as you get done studying,” I cautioned as the clock almost hit 10:30 p.m.. It was not his fault. He had been taking advanced classes that required a lot of studying and perseverance on his part. He always tried his best to finish everything on time, sometimes, ahead of time.

I slowly pushed the door to his bedroom quietly when I heard him coughed a little bit in the middle of the night.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, Mom. I’m fine,” he sleepily replied.

As a watchful mother, you could not help but notice everything even in the dark slightly illuminated by the nightlight in one corner of his room.

“Oh my!” I exclaimed in my mind. As my son went back to sleep, I noticed how much he had grown and did not really fit right on the length of his bed anymore. Either he bent his knees to be accommodated by the warmth of his bed or he must had learned to lie down on a slanting position on his back so his legs could fit and not hit the bars at both ends of his day bed. Yes…unconsciously. But…He never complained to me or my husband nor had asked if he could get another bed.

“Please get the bed today!” I requested my husband and thanks be to God that it happened to be yesterday, Saturday, when he was off from work and could make that run.

My patient and always supportive husband took his time to go to a far store to get the bed for our son and when he got home, patiently assembled the parts.

“Why are you smiling?” I asked my son as I covered him with a lighter blanket last night.

“Thanks, Mom and Dad…Ahhh…It feels so good,” he replied. “I could stretch my legs now.”

my son's new bed

In the middle of the night, as I checked upon him with now lessening coughs, I saw how comfortable he was, hugging his pillow, his new bed even had given him a wider space to make his turns side to side and was longer than his height. Height that kept growing seasons upon seasons. No matter how short or tall he might be, he was after all my child that I love so much...

I kissed his head and softly caressed his hair. I always learned something from my son. From his discomfort, he taught me how it should be in this life’s journey: to never complain and just keep pressing on because we all long for that rest. Eternal rest that the Lord provides to those who truly love and obey Him. He is our watchful Father Who always wants the best for us. Eternal Father Who loves us all first.

“Thank You Lord for everything…” I whispered as I made my way back to my bed carefully, finding my old steps aided with scattered night lights. I glanced at the stars through the windows, visible and so beautiful up on the dark skies as if Abba Father had left those night lights for me to give me reassurance of following His steps despite the darkness surrounding me in this life’s journey. Until I return and find that eternal comfort I always longed for.

^"6 So God’s rest is there for people to enter, but those who first heard this good news failed to enter because they disobeyed God. ⁷ So God set another time for entering his rest, and that time is today. God announced this through David much later in the words already quoted:    “Today when you hear his voice,
      don’t harden your hearts.” - Hebrews 4:6-7 (NLT)

Walk The Talk!

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.  
~Mother Teresa

“Why are you here? That’s not an emergency!” exclaimed one of the nurses inside the Clinic as I prepared the vital sign machine prior to letting the female inmate walked in so I could assess her further.

“You know that’s not an emergency! That could have waited until tomorrow!” she yelled at me as she saw my shadow emerging behind the door.

“It might not be an emergency but it necessitated to be examined! Like now!” I replied.

“No, it’s not! Who sent her down here?”

“Is that important to know? I was the one who got the phone call from the unit and it was me who decided to see this inmate. Why are you upset about it anyway? I’m the one seeing her?”

I glanced at the Charge Nurse who was keeping quiet, minding her own business as she heard the two of us argued. It wasn’t the right time for me to go up to her. The female inmate holding her right hand heard everything because she was just right behind me. With a worried look and concerned about what she heard, she worried more about being charged $3.00, the amount they had to pay if they requested to be seen by the medical staff.

“Nurse, am I gonna’ be charged?”

“Don’t worry about it! Just relax,” I reassured.

That particular female inmate was just treated for some abscess few days prior to that time she was in front of me. She was barely done taking her full course of a 7-days worth antibiotics issued to her by the doctor. She worked in the prison’s laundry and that day, she noticed her 5^th finger on her right hand getting inflamed and red by the knuckle area. The deputy from their unit got concerned and had asked me if I didn’t mind seeing her to make sure that the infection was not spreading.

“Keep taking the antibiotics they gave you if they are helping with what you had before,” I uttered softly.

“This looks more like a local irritation maybe from soap or some other substance you deal with in laundry. I want you to start paying attention to see if there’s anything in particular that you come across with in laundry that aggravates this every time. If you do, or any time your symptom worsens, you can always ask to be seen anyway,” I explained.

Giving her some topical medication for a possible allergy with instruction, I gave her yellow pass and called her concerned deputy.

I saw the other nurse who got upset just stepped out to go get something to drink from our Dining Area, away from the Clinic. I approached the Charge Nurse and had asked her if she heard everything and I told her that was a very inappropriate action on that nurse’s part to talk about everything where the inmate could hear our conversation, too. She told me to relax and just do what I needed to do. I gathered her lack of interest to say something to that nurse.

“I did what I had to do. I took care of the inmate’s problem despite her being against that.”

“I’m surprised to see her be upset like that. There were times when she overly-cared for others which I knew did not need any special attention,” I added.

In a little higher volume, I told the Charge Nurse, “By the way, I am relaxed!”

Like what I always believe in: “Actions speak louder than words…”

In other words, “Walk the talk!!!”

“All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.” – Proverbs 14:23 (NIV)

Just a little laugh but may we be serious in loving others without hypocrisy!