The Deepest Wounds

“My wife poked my eye!” he replied with a raising anger on his face when I asked him why it was red and the upper eyelid puffy.

I was busy last night. Screening one body after another at the prison’s Intake where the arresting officers were lined up at times, waiting for me to call their arrestee [s]. My only rest was when the Female Side would also call me in between if there were female arrestees with medical or mental health problems who were brought in.

He had a “buzz cut.” His muscular appearance told me that he must be like them, serving in the military. His face, appeared haggard despite the young age. I asked him if there was any medical issue with him.

“Yeah, my right knee was blown up when I was in Afghanistan,” he added.

I took a look at his right knee. It was not swollen nor deformed. But inside, he related about the pain that sometimes would be intolerable. That he was scheduled to go see their doctor again this Monday, the 12th for an MRI. Despite my reservation to speak with friendliness, I looked at him with so much gratitude for the service he had done and is still doing.

The pain on his right knee did not seem to bother him when I was screening him. It was more of the argument and the physical altercation that had occurred between him and his wife that night that made him angry. He was arrested for injuring his spouse, perhaps, hitting her back after she poked his eye.

“Sir, I will have you see our doctor if they end up booking you in. So that the treatment for your knee can continue.”

He got up. He was tall. Well-built. He didn’t smell like alcohol. He was appropriate so I knew he was not under the influence of any substance. I didn’t see any visible scars. His steps were close to normal. But his right leg with a slight limitation with every stride. But I knew at that time, that it was his deepest wounds that hurt him the most. A broken and bleeding heart marred by a collapsing marriage. Only time could tell. If it would ever heal.

The Bible teaches us to continue to do good despite being wronged, when our usual initial reaction is to get even. Jesus taught about keeping the desire not to keep score but to love and forgive.

“An eye for an eye. A tooth for a tooth….” It was not for personal revenge in Moses’ times. It was to limit revenge. And God did the same thing. “Wounds for wounds…” The atoning work of death on the cross was done and fulfilled to help those deepest, unseen wounds heal…

“But he was wounded and crushed for our sins. He was beaten that we might have peace. He was whipped, and we were healed!” ~ Isaiah 53:5

Yes, Jesus’ suffering resulted to forgiveness and is made available to all wounded people. Yes...all of humanity.



By His Wounds [Mac Powell]

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved

He was pierced for our transgressions
And crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed
And by His wounds, by His wounds

What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus

For more uplifting posts, please visit Spiritual Sundays, a special place where special friends gather. Thanks to sisters Charlotte and Ginger.

Crossing Over

I haven’t seen this nurse in a while. For a few weeks. I heard that her grandmother got ill, struck by the dreaded stroke. She had to take some time off and off she went to visit her in the hospital.

Last Saturday night, there she was sitting in front of the computer. I approached her and said my “hello” as her saddened face lit up and returned the gesture. Her eyes, visibly puffy and red from crying.

“How are you? How’s your grandma?” I asked one after another, with excitement upon seeing her back.

“She passed away,” she replied.

“I’m so sorry,” I uttered softly as I approached her and gave her a hug. All night long, she talked about her experiences with her at the hospital. While the rest of her family came from different locations and once again, they were re-united with their ill grandma. She related how her grandma’s fear of dying turned into a peaceful one as she felt everyone from her family surrounded her. The horrible symptoms of stroke limiting her but she managed to say “goodbye”, though some of them, she couldn’t recognize. Of how she was trying to fight sleepiness, to attend to her grandma’s needs. So hard, she said. But it was all worth it at the end.

“I’m glad you had some time to be with her.”

“Yes, Rcubes! Me, too. I was able to do things for her and she was able to tell us what she wanted. It was a good feeling even though it was hard in a way.”

How true it is for all of us! How limited we are when we are trapped or confined because of life’s pressures. Life’s trials. It is a predicament no one wants to get into. But it happens. It is unavoidable. Like that stroke.

But there is Someone Who is there beside us. The One Who took His people out of Egypt using Moses to bring His people into the Promised Land. The Israelites trapped between the mountains and the sea and being pursued by Egypt’s army, He was the One Who opened up a path through the vast waters of the Red Sea with a strong east wind. So that His people could walk through on dry ground to the other side. And as the last Israelite had crossed over, the waters rushed back over the Egyptian chariots and swept them all away. The current wiping out the entire army of Egypt. [Exodus14:15-31]

We, too must pass through the parted waters. It is not an easy feat to see two walls of divided water in each of our sides. But we must continue to trust. To believe. To have faith. In Him. Alone. He is bringing us safely to the other side. Whenever we are trapped in a situation where there seems to be no escape, if the Lord did that miracle and parted the waters, what would be hard for Him to open up a path for us so we can escape? God can surely open up a way!

For now, as we continue to pass through this difficult trek, we are being given that chance to believe and trust in Him, no matter what circumstances we are in. Stepping on many bumps along this life's road, we can just turn our heads into the left of us or to the right of us. So we can be reminded of Whose breath holds those walls of water beside us. Don't miss those miracles being done now as we walk. They are the reminders of  God's love and faithfulness. His strength and power that will enable us to make it through.

Yes, this life's journey is not easy. We are passing through a purification process. One step closer to the Promised Land, one step away from Egypt [world]. Because when we cross over, we will leave behind us all of this world's cares and riches. Just like Moses and God’s people, we will sing their song of deliverance on the other side:

“I will sing to the Lord, for he has triumphed gloriously;
he has thrown both horse and rider into the sea.
The Lord is my strength and my song; he has become my victory.
He is my God, and I will praise him;
he is my father’s God, and I will exalt him!


The Lord is a warrior;
Yes, the Lord is his name!…” ~ Exodus 15:1-3

It Was A Tactic

“Deputy…it was…just….a…court…ah…you know….. 'tactic!'” whispered the tall, heavy set woman through the big, window glass partition that separated her from me and the Infirmary deputy.

“Ahhh! There you go! Tactic? What do you mean? You lied thinking that it would make the judge feel sorry for you so you can’t be here?” replied the deputy, in a louder tone.

“Guess what? I’m going to write what you just told me in front of your jacket when you go to court so the judge will know!”

She looked slightly nervous after that short conversation. She was refusing her morning accucheck earlier with me. After hearing the deputy, she took the tiny needle I offered and poked her finger and decided to check her blood sugar. Without saying anything. As if she was thinking what to do then when she had to face the judge.

Few days ago, she walked into the jail, claiming she was pregnant. When she first got to Intake, the Intake Nurse couldn’t get a urine sample to test her for pregnancy because she refused and said that she was not able to provide a sample at that time. As nurses had no choice but follow the protocols to keep the health care going. The nurse started her on pregnant diet where she would get an extra meal at night, that others would not get, except the insulin-dependent diabetics. A yellow band was placed on her left wrist to identify her as “pregnant” for those urgent needs or medical emergencies. She was placed on prenatal vitamins daily, which she swallowed every time it was given to her. She was given a special housing, on a bottom bunk, bottom tier, which was hard to find nowadays as more sickly inmates were being booked in.

Until the follow-up care during nursing sick call came.

“Will you please send Miss C. so I can test her if she’s really pregnant?” requested one of the LVN’s to the unit’s bubble [control].

“Oh yeah! She is sooooo big! Ready to pop anytime!” answered the one who took her phone call.

But the test was negative. A blood draw was done. It was negative. All the things being given to her were taken away from her. Because the result was clear. She was not pregnant!!!

That was what she was trying to explain to the deputy that morning. It was her tactic to lie, thinking that being in such a state would make the judge change his/her mind and give her compassion so that she would not spend her days in the jail for the crime she committed. But with her lying, she then knew, her sentence would be longer….

As true followers of the Lord, we don’t have to think about many tactics to change the Judge’s decision on our wrongdoings. He knows. Period. We can’t hide anything from Him. Our actions should be filled with light, not darkness. We are His light’s reflectors. So it is important that we must avoid the deeds of evil.

“Try to find out what is pleasing to the Lord. Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, rebuke and expose them. It is shameful even to talk about the things that ungodly people do in secret. But when the light shines on them, it becomes clear how evil these things are. And where your light shines, it will expose their evil deeds.” ~ Ephesians 5:10-13

We don’t need to lie to win God’s favor. He is God of compassion. He is God of love. He is God of mercy. He is God of grace. His great love for us led Him to sacrifice His Son. So we can live. Like children who imitate their parents, that’s the key. We must follow God’s example in everything that we do [Ephesians 5:1]….



Lord, help me to seek You first. Help me to start my day with You. Help me to end my day with You. Help me to know Your things Lord because I know that every time I discover one thing from You, I am deprived of the things of this world. And You don't belong here. As Your children, we don't belong here. Thank You Lord for everything that You have done. And continue to do for me [us]. Help me draw nearer to You. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

Coming Together

“Nurse Rcubes, do you mind going inside our med room to see the deputy there with a question?” asked one of our LVN’s.

“Sure. What’s wrong?” I asked.

“You’ll see. Someone else was talking to him already. But I want your opinion,” she replied.

He was at the prime of his life, maybe early 20’s. Sitting on one of the chairs, I saw him lifting up his pant’s legs, baring his shin area and near the ankles to 4 pairs of nursing staff’s eyes. The fifth which was mine.

“I was out hunting couple of days ago. They just appeared like that. But they don’t itch or anything,” he explained with a slight anxiety that I sensed.

He had a few scattered red bumps on those areas. They didn’t look like bug bites to me. No one was saying anything except most of them told him that it must be a kind of bug bite. But because he wasn’t itching, they didn’t want to give him any cream for allergy or itching.

“Go to ER!” my suggestion cutting through that period of short silence.

“Why ER?” questioned the other nurse.

“Just because….” I replied. “They don’t look like bites to me. But I wouldn’t wait to see your primary doctor for things like that. It’s better that a doctor who might have seen something like that would know the cause of your bumps right away and can appropriately order the necessary blood works.”

The young, robust deputy grew quieter. I thought I saw him tried to swallow as if there was a big lump in his throat. His anxious face becoming more apparent. He got up and thanked all of us. I saw him walked as if he was dragging his legs.

“I hope you feel better,” I hollered as I let him out of the Infirmary.

The LVN who called me grabbed my arm when he was gone. She pulled me into a vacant examination room and started relating a story, as if it was a secret.

“Nurse Rcubes…He had cancer [I purposely didn’t want to disclose the kind] and was already treated. He was so afraid to come and ask us about what we thought of those rashes. That’s why I called you. No one seemed to know but I wanted your opinion, too. Now, he is more afraid that it had come back. You’re the only one who told him to go to ER. And that validated what he was feeling.” she kept going on and on.

“Oh, no!” I exclaimed. “I hope I didn’t scare him by saying that.”

“No! Don’t worry about it. He actually was thanking you. It was like you gave him the push to see the doctor sooner. Because it was like he was in denial.”

“You know why I said that?” “It was just a gut feeling. Now, I’m sad for him. To know his condition. He is too young. But I will keep him in my prayers,” I uttered as I ended our secret conversation.

Current update: Deputy S. is now out on a medical leave. It was confirmed that his cancer came back and on stage 4. Some deputies started making fund raising by selling t-shirts and other events. I bought 3 t-shirts but gave extra money for their cost. I wished I could have given him more. Knowing he needs a lot of financial help. He is a newly-hired deputy. He doesn’t have a lot of sick time. And now, he can’t even go to work. A lot of money was raised immediately. That’s what I heard this weekend when I went to work. We are all hurting for him. Because it’s like a big family. When one deputy or staff is hurting, everybody feels that pain. But for the one who is suffering the most, we can show that we share their pain. Through prayers or any help we can extend, to be able to reach out to their needs, even if they are not asking for help, will surely lighten their load.

How true it is with Christ’s family. His body. Us! By coming together, our trials seem to be lighter. The one suffering can be comforted to know that he/she is not alone in overcoming any trial. God has started a specific work in each of us. How beautiful it is to see if we are all working together in harmony, working together for His glory! United in God’s love. United in Christ's love.

“How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!” ~ Psalm 133:1




Please pray for Deputy S. for the Lord’s miraculous healing to cover him. And the most important of all, for him to know and accept God’s gift of salvation. The Lord knows his needs. Thank you all for always encouraging me. I am blessed to have met you all and I pray for the Lord to bless you more. Even in this blogging community, it is a wonderful experience to have met wonderful friends/brothers/sisters like you. Wonderful when we are united in His love. Glory to God for His faithfulness and all the blessings He gives us.