I couldn’t sleep last night. It was just like some other nights since I had this battle at work. The intimidation has not stopped. All of the people in power’s efforts were so evident trying to force me to resign on my own. There were times I wanted to quit. There were times I wanted everything to end by turning over my badge and electronic key from work. A quick way to drop this matter. But I never did. That would be a defeat when I had not done anything wrong.
The monitor shone its light on my insomnious face with my eyes just glued on the picture right below my posts. I had been staring at Peter who by faith asked Jesus if he could also walk on the water to approach Jesus who he and the other disciples saw walking despite the winds getting stronger and the waves becoming heavier, as their boat was crossing the lake. (Matthew 14:22-33)
“Why did you doubt, you of little faith?” Jesus asked that to Peter as he reached out his hand and grabbed him…
As I thought about my situation, I asked myself.
“Did I ever at one point doubt You Lord?”
(I know I never did…).
“Did I take my eyes of You Lord?”
(I know it had been fixed at the only Source of strength, courage, wisdom and discernment as the battle started heating up knowing how very limited and inadequate I was against my opponents)…
I know that I may never walk in water like Peter but I surely am aware that I am also walking through a tough situation. I know difficult circumstances surround me but never I once doubted that He is going through this with me. My problem?
Patience…I want all of my evidences thrown back at them. I want to end all of their accusations and stop them with the truth. I want to show them how wrong they are and that they are breaking the law. Like…Right now!!!
But that’s not what He wants. He is telling me to “wait…”
“Wait some more…”He always tells me whenever I ask Him, “When? I waited already…”
“Then, keep waiting and trusting in Me…”
Waiting is tough. But through this period, God is teaching me to trust even more in His perfect timing. He is drawing me nearer. His timetable is different from what I know. I’m thankful His ways are higher than mine.
I focused on Peter’s hand holding tight to Jesus’ grasp…He shouted, “Save me Lord!” as he started sinking. The Bible says Jesus “instantly,” “immediately,” “at once” or “straight away” reached out His hand and grabbed Peter. That is the truth that penetrated my heart. As a believer, being in a battle comes as no surprise. To know that He is the “ever present help” in times of danger, should replace any growing doubt or lessening faith…Because it’s only by belief that we come to God.
“And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.” –Hebrews 11:6 (NLT)
“Ho…hum”... I yawned almost breaking my jaw. Sleep that eluded me finally came as my heart rested in His faithful promises. I glanced at the time illuminated by the tiny, soft glow of amber light and could not believe it was almost morning...Just like the dark nights, sleepless nights, another bright day would come...Each day that He has made...
I looked once more on the picture. It was not Peter’s grasp that saved him. It was Jesus’ tight grasp. Same hold He has on me. And you who believe! Storms would come and go. No matter what...He is always faithful to reach out His hand to save those who call on Him. And believe...
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| Instantly Jesus reached out his hand and grabbed him (Peter)... | Matthew 14:31 |
This touched me, bless you my friend. I love you. This is Denise
ReplyDeleteDear one with all that you are going through you still remain an encouragement You are human. I know it has NOT been easy for you. I hear at times the desperation in your words. But, your strength in the Lord brings you back to the hope. I so appreciate you sharing that. Sleep better tonight dear one. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteHi Rosel,
ReplyDeleteThis post is another timely read for me. The waiting part is difficult, I only know that too well.
Wait in hope, for your sleepless nights will be rewarded with joy in the morning.
What confirmation or go signal have you asked God for? I think your story is getting more and more exciting! The unfolding of His purposes in your situation will reveal the truth - that He has never let go of you. His grasp on you is strong, keep trusting in Him! Never turn in that badge and key, Rosel. Never admit defeat! Look at everything from the standpoint of victory...
Love
Lidj
Lidj
I pray that He will give you peace to wait & that In His perfect timing He will be your "very present help in times of trouble". He loves you with an everlasting love & He is always faithful.
ReplyDelete