I immediately recognized that haggard face. way older than the stated age. Rubbing her mid-chest, her tears swelled.
I recalled those messy locks of hair turning gray. The lines on her forehead that spoke about the harsh habits she was entangled in. The same complaints of chest pain despite the normal findings.
"You look familiar," I couldn't believe I uttered when I usually tried to maintain my professionalism when it came to dealing with sick inmates.
"Yes, Ma'am. You've treated me once. My chest is hurting again. It started today," she rapidly responded.
"Did you get released before?" I continued.
"Yes," she coyly replied.
"What happened? What were you doing that your chest started bothering you?" I probed.
"I was released. I thought I could change. But it's impossible! I went back to using drugs!" she replied without hesitation.
"What kind and how much a day? And the last time you had the drugs?"
"Meth...a lot....and the day I got arrested, that was the last time, Ma'am."
After taking her vital signs and probing more relating to the type and degree of her chest pain, I motioned for her to go into one of the exam rooms so I could take an EKG, an electrical reading of her heart. She knew the treatment modality so well. And everything was normal.
She bowed her head in disbelief. She was very sure of this pain bothering her. How could this be impossible?
"Ma'am," I interrupted her thoughts, "Take care of yourself. It is possible that the meth had this effect on you. If every time your chest hurt, just let your unit know. They will send you down here every time. It's just good to check if there's something more serious or not. Okay?"
Meth...or Methamphetamines...One of the drugs out in the streets. Used by many. Someone can get hooked even with its first use. But the effects are disastrous. Health becomes at risk. Relationships suffer. Sensing euphoria during the early stages, only to feel sicker, angry, depressed, ashamed or guilty the next. And the users answer to the latter? To use more meth! No wonder she said that "it was impossible". Impossible to break that habit!
But I believe in God Who is able! I believe in "what's impossible to us, men, is not with God!" [Luke 18:27]
We all have our failures. We all are entangled in different kinds of sins. Of habits that are not pleasing to God. There is a way out....Jesus... Who said, "I am the only WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE..." [John 14:6; emphasis mine]. Let's turn all our impossible to possible, not with our way but with God's way....But you must believe...I was once like you except now, I believe...in Jesus...
Lord, today, I praise Your Holy Name. May you be the One glorified in everything. Lord, may many more lost wanderers turn to You. May they realize that what's impossible is not with You, our awesome God. Glory be to You now and forever. Thank You for loving us. Thank You for sending Jesus so our relationship with You can be made right because of His sacrifice. In Jesus' Name. Amen.
STUFF
1 week ago
and I know that what is impossible with man is definitely possible with HIM. GREAT POST AGAIN...have a great weekend Rosel...know that you're making a difference
ReplyDeleteRosel some people very close to me have fallen into the same trap with this drug. Soo sad and soo frustrating. I love to think that even in prison they could run across someone like you to point the finger in the right direction and make a different. May God bless the work you do. Have a good week-end. HUGS
ReplyDeleteWith God you cannot go wrong. Amen. Rosel awesome post, thank you. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteI never really know what comment I want to share...your posts are so powerful and leave me sitting silent with sadnes.
ReplyDeleteI do believe Jesus is the only real hope in life. If I did not believe in Him I know I would not be alive today.
ReplyDeleteOh Rosel, it just breaks my heart when clearly she has lost hope. I am so thankful you showed her love and compassion and with those I pray seeds of hope will encourage her and bring an awareness there is more to life than meth! Praying for her right now as well as you! May the LORD continue to use you to bring hope to the brokenhearted!
ReplyDeleteI love you so and I pray you have a blessed weekend
You find the neatest videos!
ReplyDeleteAh, meth. How horrible and so demonic. Wouldn't it be awesome if deliverance ministries were mandatory for all inmates? Without the demons they would have clarity to make wise choices. I hate satan.
God bless you Rosel. You are a precious light in a dark place!
Love,
Beth
I just did a video on You Tube that really made me think of this precious one who is suffering so...Thanks for sharing dear sister..and thank you once again for your faithfulness to join me each Friday to pray pray pray pray..I love ya girl!~
ReplyDeleteSome of us live in a far too sheltered existance that misses the pain and suffering that rages around us daily. Far too forgotten are the dangers and the sin of the world and has forgotten it's Creator Father God. Without examples and reminders in front of our daily world view, we must stop and take a good look at from where we came, where we are, who we follow and where we are being lead. Yes, we need to take up our Cross daily and follow Jesus. To love God and love our neighbor, because it is a rough and tough world that the Lord has set us in, but know that each of us are accomplishing His holy plans and purposes for the salvation of many this side of Heaven.
ReplyDeleteAmen!
ReplyDeleteMy heart is moved in what you shared Rosel. Praying...
ReplyDeleteDrugs are the easy way out and I know the pain of dealing with issues. But with God, there's no side effects. May the Lord help us not to run away from our pain but to run to Him. Love you, dear one. I'm still praying every day for you!
ReplyDeleteWithout Him, I would be nothing. Thank you for being light in a dark place.
ReplyDeleteI'm grateful that what would seem impossible is possible through God. So glad that you're there,working in that prison, the Holy Spirit within you making His presence real, even when you don't speak about God.
ReplyDelete