Learning To Endure

She glanced at me…Trying to lock her eyes with mine. But I purposely shunned away. I might seem like a cold figure to her at that moment. I saw her got up, unknowingly being watched by my spying eyes. She was trying to see what was going on inside the Infirmary. Trying to hear what the conversations were among the staff. She knew, no soul was paying attention.

She had complained of chest pain every few hours. She was already brought to the county hospital’s ER but nothing was found. She just came back from the hospital and hardly an hour had passed while in her unit, she started complaining already of chest pain. She denied any mental health history. To the nurse, she demanded to be given something to ease her nausea. Except no one saw that she was even throwing up or acting nauseous.

The charge nurse deliberately gave her what we called “bench therapy.” Meaning we would let her stay in the waiting area of the female side all night until she grew tired of it. Except there was no sign of her getting weary. Instead, she must have enjoyed the precious moment of being alone rather than being confined in a tiny cell with another unknown soul. She looked like she enjoyed watching tv and remained nosy about what the night crew was up to during the shift.

12 midnight passed by. Then, it became 1, 2, and as the clock on the wall showed the hands at 3:00 a.m., that was when she became uncomfortable. She couldn’t endure the waiting anymore. All of a sudden. She admitted she knew that she had no cardiac problem and requested to be sent back to her unit.

A yellow pass was handed right back to her cold fingers. The heavy metal door slammed right behind her as the Infirmary Deputy let her out so she could go back to her tiny cell. She must have accepted her loss. Of letting go of any temporary and short-lived comfort and pleasures. But behind these prison walls, waiting is always a process the inmates need to endure.

She waited only a few hours in that small waiting area in the Infirmary. Only to go back to the cold cell where she must learn to endure to wait for a number of days, even months, or years, as a consequence of her wrong decisions.

But this is how life is! We don’t always enjoy the lap of luxury. Some of us might not even have any. We also face that decision to go after these worldly comforts or we can share with Christ’s suffering. Sometimes, we suffer for so long. And through those hard times and life’s pressures weighing down on each of us, we learn not only to endure. But also to trust. To hope for the future glory.

“However, as it is written: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived   what God has prepared for those who love him.” - 1 Corinthians 2:9


  1. My heart felt sad for this woman as you described her time of waiting. I can only imagine what it is like to be in a small cell locked away. And yet, how many people don't realize that they are imprisoned by their sins? To be set free from the penalty of my sin is something I hope to never take for granted. It is life.

    May the Lord bless you and protect you as you care for those who are often neglected or shunned by others. I pray that God would give you eyes to see the hurt and lost.

    Blessings and love,

  2. Waiting must be difficult for the inmates. I'm glad you are feeling better. I'm continuing to pray, dear sister!

  3. All the harshness of this world will be forgotten when we stand face to face with our Lord.


  4. Rosel, glad you are feeling a bit better. Oh wow waiting is not my strong attribute. Thank you for sharing dear one. Blessings.

  5. I am always blessed by your insights and testimonies.

  6. How very sad, Praying she will turn her life around and accept God.

    Hope you are well. Much Love,

  7. Praying you continue to feel much better sis. I love you.

  8. Well written, Rosel. Hope you are doing well.

    Have a great week!-- Lou

  9. OK, I'll admit it, the "bench therapy" remark brought a smile from me. Sounds like an effective treatment modality.

    Life certainly does include waiting and I'm so very grateful that we have a wonderful future to look forward to.

  10. This side of Heaven, we are in the flesh, but strive to walk in the Spirit daily and grow in the likeness of our Lord Jesus. Its not an easy walk always, but our attitude can always hold tight to the fact that this is our Fathr's world. He is in control, even when we are not.

    This is my Father's world. O let me ne'er forget that though the wrong seems oft so strong, God is the ruler yet.
    This is my Father's world: why should my heart be sad? The Lord is King; let the heavens ring! God reigns; let the earth be glad!

  11. I can't imagine the helplessness of having those doors lock behind me. I pray all inmates come to know Jesus while confined.

    Bless you sweet Rosel!


"Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase..."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

All posts/composed songs copyright by RCUBEs.


The Attacker (5/15/09)

The sun was just peeking from the Eastern skies. Ephesians 6:12 [37 kb]

Out in the prison’s yard, some huge Sheriff’s buses were illuminated by the soft glow coming from the lights all over from the tall lamp posts. Their engines were turned on, warming up, before the buses would take the inmates to the different courts where they would have their trials.

Orange-uniformed men were lined up in pairs, joined together with handcuffs and chained, forming a long line. They already had their breakfast and had their morning medications prior to going to courts. Some were fidgeting, as they waited to board those buses.

All of a sudden, all hell broke loose! Two men were engaged in a fight, using weapons they made secretly for a while. Deputies called for help on the radio, both for custody back-up and medical staff, as well.

When the air was cleared and the other inmates were secured, one man was down on the floor. He sustained multiple gashes but two of them were deep. One cut was vertically etched from his left ear going down to the jaw line. The other dangerous cut was horizontal on his left neck, close to the jugular vein. Pool of blood dripped all over the floor. Holding his bleeding neck, he was pointing at the other inmate few feet away, being guarded by the other deputies.

The other man being accused was not hurt. There were no lacerations nor any other signs of trauma. He was obviously very agitated as he was being questioned by those deputies, while the medical staff started treating the other man on the floor. They cleaned the wounds and controlled the bleeding. That man was sent to the nearby hospital.

When the investigation was finalized, it turned out to be that the “downed man who was accusing the other inmate” was the attacker and the other one who didn’t have injury was the one attacked. The deputies found out that it was the second attempt to attack the unhurt man. Both attacks on him failed. He was well-prepared after the first attempt on him, that when the second attempt was done, he was able to defend himseld and ended up injuring his attacker severely.

[Source: Life Application Bible]:

We also have an “accuser of the brethren.” Satan and his army of demons are the enemies of God and of everything good.

“Because God’s children are human beings – made of flesh and blood – Jesus also became flesh and blood by being born in human form. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the Devil, who had the power of death.” –Hebrews 2:14

Because of what Jesus had done [dying on the cross], we, who live in constant fear of death shouldn’t be afraid anymore. Jesus had freed us from that fear so we can live for Him. When we belong to God, we know that death is only the portal that leads into “eternal life”. [“Thank You Lord!].

Paul warned us, too that we also battle against the evil forces of Satan, who is a vicious fighter. But to be able to withstand their attacks, we must depend on God’s strength and use every piece of His armor. We face an army whose goal is to defeat Christ’s church. When we believe in Christ, they become our enemies. They will try any device to turn us away from the Lord.

Fear not! For God has provided His supernatural power to defeat Satan and his army, through His Holy Spirit within us. So, arm yourselves with God’s armor.

Let us be strong in the Lord's mighty power. Let's put on His whole armor to resist the enemy's attacks: put on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God's righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that we are well-prepared. We will need faith in every battle as our shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed by Satan and his army. Let us put on salvation as our helmet, not forgetting the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. Let's pray at all times, on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. We must stay alert and be persistent in our prayers for all Christians everywhere. [Ephesians 6:10-18].