Listen To Me

“God whispers in our pleasures, but shouts in our pain.” - C.S.Lewis

“But I don’t like to do this! I have told everyone here that I’m not diabetic! I’m not on meds! I’m not on anything!” uttered this obviously upset female inmate. When her turn came to do her blood sugar check, she started going off, while the others before her were efficient in doing their own and receiving the morning insulin doses and sat right back to the chairs in the waiting area.

I didn’t expect that from her. I had seen her before as I always tried to help the LVN’s do the morning accuchecks on the female side. So they could just concentrate on the male side, being that there was a big number. I didn’t want our attention distracted, much more so with the Infirmary Deputy, that I always volunteered to take care of the female diabetics.

She continued to complain and whine loudly, as if I had caused her all the troubles. I wasn’t saying anything the whole time and just let her do the ranting at the beginning. The big glass partition window, almost fogging up with her breath of anger every second that passed by. Almost out of breath and breathing fires through her nostrils, she smeared the Accucheck machine with her blood.

“That’s not the first time she did that, Ma’am!” whispered one disgusted inmate. The rest who saw what she had done did not want to use the same machine fearing they might catch something from the blood-smeared tiny machine.

“Listen to me!” I spoke with a slightly higher tone of voice and didn’t allow her to cut me off the entire time, as I waved at the nearby deputy, giving her a signal that I got it and did not need her help at that time yet.

“You don’t have to come here screaming at the top of your lungs when the nursing staff is just trying to help you. We won’t force you to do your accuchecks if that’s what you want. When you first came in here at this jail, your sugar was way high, that’s why the nurse who saw you started this to monitor you.”

“Here!” I continued, “Just sign this piece of paper and you won’t need to come down here and act this way, smearing our machine with your blood, when you know many use this. As long as you’re aware that we’re not going to be responsible if anything happens with you when your blood sugar either goes way high or way low, then, just sign this. Even up to the point of death as a consequence since we wouldn‘t be able to check your blood sugar!”

She was visibly wanting to interrupt me but something held her back. At that time, I wearily remained quiet but constantly looked at her eye to eye. She tried to avoid my eye contact. She paused. Smokes stopped coming out of her nostrils by that time. She must have started weighing in the word “consequence” when I said it loudly. She got quiet and proceeded to do her accucheck anyway. I had heard, she came with the rest of the group, day to day ever since.

I wonder how many times I ranted in front of Him. Of the way I like to run things in my life when obviously He’s the only One Who has the control. Why doesn’t it sink in sometimes? And every time I reach the limit and try to meet Him and question Him, He doesn’t come with a roaring Voice. He never meets me with any surprises. He remains quiet most of the time. But in that silence, that’s how I know He’s there. He’s giving me that opportunity to be quiet myself. To learn to be still. To be able to listen. To be able to trust. To be able to believe. So I can know more things about Him. He lets me think over what “consequences” will happen if I don’t go His way. He lets me think things through. That just because I think I’m right doesn’t mean I am. He knows best…And I know being my loving heavenly Father, He always wants the best for His children. Even if it would hurt at times. Yes…in that silence, in that quiet place, that’s where I feel His presence the most. And He's inviting all to "Listen to Me!"


“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.” ~ John 10:27

27 comments:

  1. You have a difficult job and you do it with grace and eloquence. I am very glad to know you. I pray for you daily and I hope you have a wonderful week. Anne

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  2. @Annesphamily:Glory be to the Lord! He's the One Who sustains me with everything I need...Thank you for your precious prayers[and to you, other friends as well]. I know they are working :) Blessings to you sister and may God bless you more. Keeping you all in my prayers, too. What an awesome way to be able to do this chorus, and lift the notes up to the heavens!

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  3. I have been guilty of "screaming" at God. I'm so thankful He knows me and understands and just shows me grace and mercy when I act this way. Praying you have a great week!

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  4. Thanks for those thoughts, Dear. I pray I will listen to His quiet voice.

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  5. I so can relate with you, sister Beth :)

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  6. Me, too...sister Cathy...This world truly is good at pulling us away from listening to Him. Thanks be to God for the strength that comes from Him.

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  7. How many times have I been one to question, to doubt, or to rant @ our Father!!?? His Love, Patience, Grace & Mercy! What would we be without HIM! Bless you Rosel for shining brightly in all you do! Your patience and love with those you encounter each day are just like our Lord!

    Praying you have a blessed week!

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  8. @ sister Loren: Thank you but glory be to God! Thank you for your prayers! God bless.

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  9. What a wonderful post! I am so thankful that God listens to my voice, and treats me with love...especially during those times when I rant at Him, or question Him about things in my life.

    I hope you have a blessed week. You have a difficult job, and I admire how you handle it. (My husband used to work in our state juvenile corrections before he retired.) God bless you.

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  10. it's so true. He is calm when we aren't. He is there for us always, even though we aren't always there for Him. He is patient, when we aren't.

    Beautiful post.

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  11. Delightful post dear one. Blessings to you as you go on this week.

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  12. Thanks for all you do for our Father, love you sis.

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  13. Again Rosel I think there are soo many of us that can relate to this post. I know I can for sure. It is so difficult with our human natures to not rant and rave out our frustrations or want to do things our own way sometimes. But your right, it is important to remember there are ALWAYS consequences, both for when we don't listen AND for when we do. Which consequences do we want? You'd think somewhere in there we'd learn huh? haha I pray the Lord continues to bless you as you got about such a difficult and important job. Debbie

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  14. @SusanB: I'm grateful that He understands our shortcomings. That He never runs out of patience. And that He always forgives us. I hope your hubby had a great time experiencing how it was like to work in a prison system. Blessings.

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  15. @ sister Lynda: May we learn to be patient like Him in all things. God bless.

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  16. JBR: Thank you for always encouraging me. It means a lot. God bless and may you have a blessed week ahead. Be strong in His power!

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  17. @ sister Denise: Thanks for yours...Love and blessings to you and thank you for your prayers.

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  18. @ sister Debbie: This world's way of programming us is awful! May we be willing to be renewed and be reprogrammed of His ways. God bless.

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  19. Rosel,
    We are so blessed that God listens to us all the time - when we are angry, sad, laughing, or any other time! You handle your difficult job with grace and firmness which are triats to be desired. Thank you, friend!


    Blessings,
    Jean

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  20. I adore your phrase above:

    "But in that silence, that’s how I know He’s there. He’s giving me that opportunity to be quiet myself."

    To learn to quiet ourselves is truly valuable.

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  21. @sister Jean: Yes, thanks be to God that His ways are not like ours. Blessings.

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  22. @ sister Tracy: It's not easy....Still a big work for me! God bless.

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  23. I know there are many times I would ask 'Why this or why that' and how come I dont have this or that....many times I would have to just listen and not figure things out on my own. This is something I am still working on....Although I have improve in some areas. Thanks for sharing!!

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  24. He's listened to my tirades many times and has comforted me in them, too.

    Be blessed Sister.

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  25. Sometimes I have trouble listening to His quiet voice. HE does so care for us.

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  26. Thank you Rosel for this message that sometimes we all need to hear. We are so busy trying to fix or do things for ourselves that we don't hear God's soft voice telling us "It will be okay...Just trust me!" God's blessings too you. Lloyd

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  27. I give GOD the glory for this message and all the ways that HE has and continues to use your life for His glory dear sister. I just prayed for you and your family.

    Grateful for a message that is ministering to my heart...

    Love you!

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"Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase..."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

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