God's Plan...Terminated!

“The product, abortion, is skillfully marketed and sold to the woman at the crisis time in her life. She buys the product, finds it defective and wants to return it for a full refund. But, it’s too late.” ~ Carol Everett

I faced many of them during unexpected sick calls. Some getting incarcerated for the first time after being caught with drug use. So nervous and not knowing what would happen, they would complain of severe abdominal pain. Thinking that it would be an excuse to release them from the prison. They don’t know. They are just sent out to county’s ER to be evaluated and treated. Then, they are just returned to the prison when the treatment is done. Even if medical staff knows some of them are faking it, there is no other choice but to send them out to ER. For there is a growing “life” inside their womb. Despite the drug use.

“I am going to have an abortion,” confidently stated one to me, long time ago, during a sick call at the middle of the night.

“I respect your decision, Ma’am…And if you don’t mind me asking you, have you evaluated all of your options before doing so?” I queried. Trying not to be judgmental nor get into her privacy.

“I don’t want this baby!” she uttered.

[“Why did you get pregnant in the first place?” was the question screaming at the back of my mind that remained there….Just in the back of my mind...There are many contraceptives available out there...She was into drug addiction. And she denied being raped. That it was a mutual thing between her and the baby's father.]

Life of a Correctional Nurse is tough. Because you have to respect decisions that may be against what you believe in. Knowing that those people who are for abortions are here today, and were born! They were given a chance to be born! But not these unborn, premature babies: “precious beings”.

And I’m talking about those pregnant women who have the capacity to carry their baby into full term and who willingly knew that they would have a chance to get pregnant as they made love with the men they were with. Yet they are the same ones who decided that abortion was the only way they can get rid of this burden. Often times, they think of abortion as a quick solution to their unwanted pregnancies.

My heart breaks every time I hear a female prisoner stating their willingness to commit abortion. I often wonder if they are in the best mental capacity to make that decision. Because some of them are uncertain of what the future holds for their babies, being trapped in the cycle of drug use, of prostitution, of alcohol use and lack of family’s help or financial difficulties. I am not mad at them. I feel sorry for them because they are living broken lives that need the restoration that only comes from the Lord.

How do I share this: “11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” [Jeremiah 29:11] and this:

“You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.” Psalm 139:13

Abortion….To me is a man’s way of committing mercy [at least, that‘s what they think]. But in reality, it is a man’s way of ending God’s will for a precious life He created.

God's plan? "Terminated!"

"Brothers, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature." -(1 Corinthians 14:20ESV)

"My son, fear the LORD and the king, and do not join with those who do otherwise, for disaster from them will rise suddenly, and who knows the ruin that will come from them both?" -(Proverbs 24:21-22 ESV)

"Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate." -(Psalms 127:3-5 ESV)


  1. So difficult to remain loving and respectful when this occurs. However, I know both you and I are doing GOD's will. As for how to convey HIS plans for their unborn child and the love HE has for it and the future HE has...I struggle, too. I pray GOD will give me the right words when I am in similar situations.
    Praying with you, sweet friend!
    Hugs, andrea

  2. Breaks my heart. I am lucky to have the one child I do have. I know many who want to adopt and many that can't afford the process. What a precious life they are given and then throw it away....but many reject the gift of life through Christ too.

  3. Oh my . . . my heart is breaking . . . why can't they see what they are doing?
    I lost a baby years ago . . . miscarriage at my home. As I held the tiny little being in my hand my heart shattered . . . We need to pray sister Rosel.
    Dear God,
    Please stop these women from hurting/killing their children. Thank you GOD for holding each child in your GREAT HANDS!!!
    I love you, Lord!!!

  4. It's sad that our nation has legalized the murder of the innocent. It's understandable that Godless people would think that abortion is an option but what is unthinkable to me is that many professing Christians look at abortion as just another way of birth control.

    Luke 17:2 (New King James Version)

    It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.

  5. Just another of the enemy's tricks to say, "This is not really a life, just a tadpole" or "Who's it gonna hurt". Lies to kill, steal (peace) and destroy (not only the child's life, but the mother's). Sadly, the repercussions for these types of decisions are often not seen until way into the future. We reap later than we sow.
    Thank you Rosel for this controversial post. I will be praying about it.

    Hugs and blessings dear friend,

  6. Wow! That video is very eye opening and powerful!

  7. What a tough situation for you -- and for these poor women who don't see they have options.

    God bless you for respecting them in spite of their decisions (we are all, after all, sinners).


  8. What a power mesaage today! It breaks my heart to know that many young women are subject to being falsy talked into having an abortion when they could have had other options.

    I just updated Kat's blog ans she is doing very well after sugery which was a 100% success!

    Keep the Faith!

  9. So sad that its happening. We live in a dying world. But thanks be to God for the hope that is in Christ!
    The video is truly amazing.

    Have a lovely weekend and springtime my friend.
    God bless.


  10. Abortion was never an option in my life-yet it happened! I never thought I would be the one participating-yet I did. I have never spoken of this in an open forum like this-yet I feel the need to today. The pain and anguish that comes after, YEARS and YEARS after, never goes away. My only reprieve is that Christ died for my sins and they are gone as far as the east is from the west... He knew what my choice would be on that day-it was no surprise to HIM. I hide this terrible secret in my soul from my family, from my children, yet it battles to get out. Just know the mistakes we make are all judged the same by God--but some of our mistakes last a lifetime in our minds!

  11. I know how it is when you're talking with someone who is determined on having an abortion. I have the same screaming words going on in my head, too.

    The video was heartbreaking but it needs to be shown. Months after my abortion, I had nightmares of my baby trying to get away from the instrument that was about to take his life.

    God has taken what was meant for evil and know uses it for good. I thank Him everyday for His love and how He turned ashes into

    love and hugs~Tammy

  12. Sister Lisa and sister Tammy, thank you both for coming here and showing your courage to share your own stories...I know that if you had more understanding then, it might not have resolved to that decision? And that's why I need to write about this. Knowing in my heart that these women are not different than those who are not incarcerated. And I'm grateful for the life-saving power that comes from our Lord Jesus Christ...I'm hoping that by bringing it out, it will minister and encourage to those who are hurting. And who are facing such situations currently. We all go through tough times...Go through tough decisions...And that's my prayer...for the Lord to minister to such situations...and let His will be done...Blessings to all of you and thank you for speaking from your hearts. This issue is not easy. But any thing when brought to His light hopefully, we will see the mistakes, us, humans do...There is no big sins that the Lord is not able to forgive....

  13. What a powerful post...and filled with God's Word...Your right, how do you share it? I thought of just covering them with God's Word. Quietly or spoken out loud WE KNOW His Word shall not return to Him void..You plant the Lord's 'seed'...He will water won't He..in His time..His way...

    This was beautiful and touching and heart wrenching..I love your writings.

  14. Dear Rosel,
    This is a powerful yet heart-breaking post. I am very thankful that they don't allow abortions here where I live. Those who wish to commit this crime must do so out of the province. We are the only province in Canada where it is illegal to have an abortion. Sadly, I expect that will change someday. Heaven help our unborn!


  15. Oh Rosel....what a heartbreaking and yet powerful post....I know women even like these that experience years of remorse and years of guilt and shame, pain etc. Even though these women that are incarcerated make the decision at the moment I pray the Lord will heal them because we don't know their future or what HE does have in store for them....but HE does! may they find HIM, may they come to know HIM and may the be Saved and Forgiven!
    Bless you my friend....I love you so!

  16. These past few years I have been surrounded by moms that have been unable to conceive and would do anything to have a child. There are people close to me that have had abortions. One friend was not able to conceive after it. It is all so sad. Just so sad. ~

  17. So very heart breaking my friend.

  18. Rosel,
    It is so sad that so many feel that "it" is nothing and can so easily be gotten rid of...worse though is when a baby is born alive despite an abortion and left to die and not to be resusitated. I can't understand it. It breaks my heart.


  19. I'm in agreement with both you and the other readers comments; that abortion is heartbreaking, that human life is a precious gift of God.

    I'm grateful that God has you in that specific prison; that you are part of His presence in that place.

  20. Wow, it must really be hard, for you to be neutral when it comes to sharing one someone that you cannot really tell them what to do with their body. You may be able only to plant the seed, and from there on the Lord can help them. Great post Rosel. Blessings.

  21. powerful Rosel and really sad...I don't get how anyone can see that these are not 'babies.' You are a shining light...a voice in the dark...keep shinging that awesome light of yours. Praying for you as you face some terribly hard situations in your work...You're the best Rosel...know that...and I'm really glad I found and connected with you. Sarah

  22. Hey Rosel, if you have a problem ordering..email me. My email is in my profile both on my blog and www.gentlerecovery.webs.com

    Stay strong ok...the enemy just wants to discourage sometimes.

  23. RECUBEs
    Thank you! for sharing your position - it is a difficult position to be in. I've experienced similar situations in my positon as residental counselor in the homeless shelter. There are limits to what we can say and do to offer real HELP of a lasting kind.

    So, I pray God's strength and power for you - for the TRUTH - simple seeds of TRUTH - He will give you the words to share - even on an individual basis. The very words that they need to hear that will open their ears and eyes and soul to a different way. He has placed you in an awesome position for silent ministry. You can PRAY for them on an individual basis. What a WATCHMAN you are. You are a gatekeeper. God bless you for HIs gifts in you!! You are His willing instrument of TRUTH. Thank you for being there in your position - may we join with you - in prayer for HIs work in and through you ... I am grateful to be linked with you here and in prayer for all of those that I will never meet - BUt You will!

    You may know, from my place - that I have experienced abortion - my first born was deceptively aborted with the newly legalized pill in April of 1972. Just months after the piull became legal in America. The Hawaiian Doctor - told me that it would not hurt the baby - 'if I was pregnant'. He did not tell me that I was... I went to confirm that my baby was indeed growing inside of me - He dismissed her life by choosing to keep the TRUTH from me - and instead, gave me a tiny white pill - that ultimately terminated God's plan for my baby's life.

    This I know because God - in HIs love - allowed me to hold my baby in the palm of my hand - after obviously experiencing indescribale pain - the Lord protectedd me from the memory of the pain - but allowed me to hold her before she left this earth realm to be with God. It was as if it never happened -God and I were the only ones that knew of her existance! EXCEPT for this deceptive DR.

    I share this because, I believe there are others out there who were also deceived in this manner.(particularly around this season of the 'newness' of this pill) Doctors have been placed on a pedestal and thus we have wrongly trusted them - to tell us the TRUTH about our own bodies. We need to be informed - We need to take every thot before the Lord. We need to seek other wise counsel. We cannot TRUST mere man to make these life & death decisions for us.

    The very fact - that a life was deceptively killed within my womb - knowingly or not - has dumped on me all of the same horrific issues that others are plagued with - when they choose to abort the life of their child. It's not so much in the CHOICE as it is in the reality of this shed blood in our 'land' - our own body.

    Yes, baby Patrina is with God. And I am her voice...her hands... her feet...she did not leave this world without leaving her footprints on my life. So, to Lisa G - I applaud you for your open heart here today... God bless you for your strength!! He will suprise you with this new voice!!

    I had not publicaly shared my story until God released it one day on Tammy's site. He chose the day and time. And now, I am free to speak through baby Patrina's voice.

    Our tiny gifts from God did not leave this earth realm un-noticed. They are being recognized all over the world - right here - through our voices! ~ and the many others who are speaking up!! YEAH GOD!! So, Lisa G. Thank you and I want to say that this is the beginning of a new thing in your life - with God.

    Tammy, thank you again for sharing. You are such a strong voice in the darkness - A LIGHT on a hill - God bless your with more strength to send forth the healing balm of God's restorative LOVE!!

    Again, RECUBEs, thank you for this open forum to share God LOVE through all things. He makes all things NEW - when brought into the LIGHT of HIs transforming LOVE! YOU, my dear are a precious gift to the blogging community - I appreciate you!!

    Patrina <")>><
    His Watchman on the wall

  24. Sister Patrina, thank you for your honesty also. I'm glad you shared your story, too. I didn't know what to post prior to this. Sometimes, I'm that way. And when I ask the Lord about what to post, He will answer right away by giving me the thoughts. I always learned now, to always follow Him, when to post, what to post. Knowing that everything happens in His perfect time. And knowing that someone who might need help or info and encouragement may happen to pass by.

    I'm sorry that, that dr. didn't disclose the truth regarding that pill. And I agree, sometimes, some of them think they are God. That's why it's important that we seek counsel...

    What's always true is that we know God is always in control no matter what. All the bad things He does turn into good to those who love Him. Like sister Tammy now being used in this ministry. And God bless you, sister Lisa and others out there who are starting to speak out about this delicate matter. It's never easy to come out and be courageous. But the Lord will equip you when you are willing to be used for His glory. Blessings to all of you. Thank you sister Patrina for leaving these precious footprints today at Off The Beaten Trek.

  25. This is another area that I can see we need to undergird you in your work at the correctional center. Thank you for posting!

  26. Rosel,

    You already know my story from visiting my prolife/abortion recovery blog. I never saw myself making that sinful decision but I did almost 19 years ago and the pain was real and deep in my soul and while I'm grateful for the forgiveness and healing that comes through Christ I still miss my baby and stand for the lives of other precious unborn and the wombs that carry them.

    It's a very difficult subject for most but if we remain silent more babies will die.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts here Rosel. God bless and keep you precious sister.

  27. Thank you sister Lisa. And may the Lord continue to guide you and protect you as well as you minister to those needing to hear about this. God bless.

  28. I am also grieved when I hear young people talk of abortion as if it is the sensible correct thing to do: an easy problem to solve, they say. Father forgive them. I am so thankful for women who choose adoption when they feel they cannot care for the baby.

  29. I cried through this video. Powerful. I am so thankful that God uses you to touch & give hope to so many. And in so many ways! Bless you!

  30. It's such a sorry blight on our country's DNA, the loss of so many millions of little ones.

    I appreciate your way with words and a story. You capture nuances that might otherwise escape our notice. Your time within the corrections domain has served you, and us well.


  31. Your post overflowed with love Rosel. It's so much "easier" to avoid controvercial kinds of topics; but I pray God will lead some sweet sisters here who need to hear the truth surrounded by love.

    Your posts always bless me and fill my heart. May God bless you and keep you this evening!

  32. This post has bothered me for so long now.
    I can not lay it to rest in 4,096 characters allowed by Blogger. And so, I let it go here with a double post comment. Pass on by if it is too long for you.

    Part 1 of 2

    Five pregnancies while married; two daughters born. I was told "miscarriage". I learned the meaning of lies.

    The bill came in the mail after I returned from a high school reunion far away...alone.
    The movers wanted paid.
    I called to see what the mistake was, as my home was in order, nothing moved, my now "Ex" at work, and kids at school/daycare.

    The manager told me that he sent a moving van as requested months before. It arrived an hour after I boarded a plane to my reunion. The truck was loaded up, prepared to move everything while I was gone, and then, inexplicably, the movers were ordered to put it all back. They did.

    "I had to bill you because my men did the work they were hired to do", said the manager.

    "Give me the address they were moving to", I requested. (I paid the bill).

    I drove to that home, to discover I owned another home I knew nothing about. A home of many affairs. It began to gel in my mind that five pregnancies resulting in two births had nothing to do with miscarriage, and everything to do with abortion.....who is the real dad??

    Divorce ensued and my two daughters were placed in my custody. I needed to play catch up for court to obtain that custody....PROOF.

    I asked a friend to go down on garbage day and toss my garbage can on the ground as garbage men do. Pick up the same colored can of hers, and bring it to me, and dump it inside my garage.
    Reams of "Proof" came weekly, as she tossed out "evidence".

    But it was in the back bedroom bathroom, under a drawer that I inadvertantly pulled all the way out by accident, that a pink paper fell out. It was directions to a spot in the next state. We had relatives in that area, so I thought it was directions to them.
    I showed the paperwork to a woman in the court battle underway, and she told me that an abortion occurred. Men can be dense at some of these words written.

    I asked a friend to call the clinic and confirm. He did. I can not say how it was confirmed. He cried. I was in shock.
    The papers were in great detail, for the trip to murder a child. My children were 2 and 11, but I was missing three in between.

    Ten years passed and I told my now 12 year old that we needed to make a trip and have a proper funeral service for a child buried long ago. My daughter wrote a letter to her sibling, never born. She wrote scripture passages she wished she could have taught her younger sibling. She took family pictures with her too.

    We followed the directions on the pink papers in my wallet the prior ten years. It rained all the way. Police were everywhere as clinics draw murder inside and outside, depending on political/moral viewpoint, but murder it is, either way.
    I circled the block and came to the clinic via an alley behind. There was the dumpster that held my child long ago.

    We were alone and my daughter read her letter aloud, quoted scripture that she found endearing, pointed out who was who in the pictures she brought, and said to me:
    "Your turn dad,...I'm done".

  33. Part 2 of 2

    And so I held my part of the funeral.
    The rains poured tears from heaven and in larger quantities as I spoke inside my car.
    Not a soul was present save my younger daughter. (The elder was in college far away).

    My daughter took all she had brought and spoken, and pictures too and put everything in a Ziploc. I did the same with mine.
    I took the two Ziploc bags and went out in the rain, moved over to the dumpster "casket", and laid the packets on the ground. I covered them with a potted plant of Irises....the flower of the mentally ill. The rain seemed to lift the Irises toward heaven from their lilt in the car.
    The service ended. Go in Peace.

    I explained to my daughter that her sibling had a name....."Chosen".
    "Why "Chosen" dad?", she asked.

    "This child died in that dumpster on May --, ten years ago", I explained. It was early in the first trimester, or I as husband would have knowledge of pregnancy.

    Moving day was July; custody was awarded to me in November. Add up the months and a mom with child would walk into court about a week old, or with a mom with stomach out to here, pregnant, I explained.

    In court, there is no way that any man would gain custody of a daughter 2 years old, with mom holding a new born...regardless of father.

    I told my daughter that this child of the rainy funeral was Chosen by God for her to be placed in my custody with her older sister. My intent in court was to keep the children together. The opposition wanted the youngest child only----longer child support. It crushed my older daughter to be unwanted; she does not understand to this day.

    My youngest child held my hand for the three hour ride home in the rain.
    Chosen, was laid to rest properly, and finally.
    My daughter took precisely one picture of Irises on top of two Ziplocs, filled with the phrases and pictures of our funeral service.

    I do not have to explain choice or pro-life or all the political arguments to my daughters.
    It is all summed up on a picture of "Chosen's" funeral....and the array of Irises that looked heavenward when exposed to falling rain.

    May 23rd is celebrated each year in memorial.
    I do not know the dates of the other two children I had, as they entered heaven, so all are celebrated May 23rd.

    We never had Report Cards or Proms; grandchildren or even a family fight.
    Three kids disappeared.

    "I wonder what the people inside thought, when they came outside to the dumpster again and saw our flowers and pictures and notes to "Chosen", my daughter mentioned one day.

    It was one of few times in my life as a parent that I had no answer or comment in reply to my child. May 23rd passes by in difficulty every year.

  34. Rosel, what an amazing post! I, like you, is so against abortion. There is never any reason good enough to end the life of a child. I even read to my children while they were still in my womb! My husband thought I had lost my mind, but I didn't care. I knew they could hear me. I would even put headphones to my belly so they could listen to music. LOL

    Thank you so much for writing this important post. I know for a fact unborn babies are real... they are not just a fetus or a glob of cells. When I was 5 months along with Amber, my doctor did a sonogram. We watched as that little thing's heart was just a beating. Then, the doctor laughed and said, "Oh, my goodness." I replied with "What?", and he told me Amber was sucking her thumb. I have the sonogram picture of it. So cute, and sure enough, she was my thumb sucking baby. You can also see in the picture where her left hand is up near her head. Well, after she was born, we realized she was twirling her hair and to this day, she still twirls her hair. Isn't that something?

    Well, I could go on and on regarding this subject, but I don't want to use up all your comment space. Love you, my dear sister. God bless you for writing this post... for being a voice for those who can't speak for themselves! *huge hugs*

  35. @ Keystone: Resting now, after last night's work, I'm glad I'm able to go back and read yours and other friends' comments I had not seen before. I want to thank you for sharing your story and it truly broke my heart. I can't imagine the pain you had to go through when you found out about that house and the "lost babies". I remember some of your stories when you shared about your 2 daughters and the battles in court you had to endure while fighting for their custody back at "the Girl in the Glasshouse." I'm glad you won! And that they are together with you.

    I hope that those who saw what you did at the clinic would open their eyes/hearts to this horrible act of killing innocent, unborn child.

    May God's comfort continue to cover you and your daughters. I appreciate all of your heartfelt comments and I wish blogger can allow us to post longer sometimes. Thank you again Keystone and may you have a great week ahead as we celebrate the Lord's sacrifice and Resurrection. Thank you to all of you who came by and paid me a visit!


"Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase..."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

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