“Dad, just rest,” I softly whispered to my ill father, as I lightly wrap my left arm across his chest. Reminiscing the many memories he shared with us, as every hour quietly slipped away, marking every hour of his imminent physical departure.
“I can’t…Lord, please take me now,” he mumbled under his breath but those words had audibly reached my sense of hearing. Trying to mask his pain, he seldom spoke of the severity of pain from his abdomen he had to endure. My father was dying from colon cancer. The year was 2007.
His prayers remained constant. A constant pleading to have his journey be halted. By the Hands of his Creator. Silence. His eyes closed and his breathing became more normal. As if he fell into a deep sleep, my brothers and I were just huddled close to him. We were like little kids buying more time to cling to our father. Holding him, hugging him, kissing him. As our hearts already had holes that fit the size of our dearest mother, 7 years prior to that, were again preparing to be broken.
Suddenly, his eyes opened and with a soft voice strengthened by his love for us, he spoke, “It’s okay now. I can wait. We go in groups and my group is next.”
“Dad, are you okay? What’s my name?” came out the nurse in me, assessing him for his orientation.
“Rosel! You’re Rosel! Yes, I’m okay. I told you, I can wait now. The Lord will get me when it’s okay with Him. But He told me, that we must learn to forgive. Because when we don’t, that’s why it takes us a long time to go to His place,” he uttered with his remaining strength.
His mind was very clear. And whatever he said might have been from a dream. But there was a truth into that statement. For the Lord did want us to learn to forgive.
My father was a joker. And despite being on bedrest the whole time, he managed to joke around with all of us. He was in good spirits. He accepted the Lord in the year 2003. And the depression he had gone through after half of his heart departed [my mother], was replaced by the joy that came from knowing His Savior. He loved helping others. He loved sharing whatever things he had to those who were in need.
If not for Jesus, I knew then, my brothers and I wouldn’t have comfort and peace. Because of His promise of eternal life to those who would believe in Him, we had that heavenly hope of being reunited, first with Jesus, and then, with our loving parents and other lost loved ones who accepted Jesus in their hearts.
I kissed my father and put my mouth near his ear, “I love you dad. Be patient and wait for the Lord.”
He turned his head to where I was and answered, “I love you. I want you and your brothers to know that I love you all so much. I’ll wait. Because God knows the perfect time.” He closed his eyes. And I knew, the waiting had begun. But it was all worth the wait…”
My eyes shed some tears...of mixed emotions: tears of knowing how much would be missed and tears of joy knowing we had a great reunion to look forward to...
“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. 2In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4You know the way to the place where I am going." ~ John 14:1-4
STUFF
1 week ago
You will never know how very much this post touched my heart, thank you sweet sis. I love you.
ReplyDeleteRosel, I am so sorry for your loss. My Daddy has passed away and not a day goes by that I do not still miss him. You are such a blessing to have as a friend. Love you. Audrey
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing that sweet story with us, Dear. And the little video was cute.
ReplyDeleteMy heart has been touched this day by your words Rcubes. Heartfelt blessings to you and yours.
ReplyDeleteHi Rosel,
ReplyDeleteThe story about your dad was so precious. To be able to wait, with hope, despite the unbearable pain of cancer... I believe God gave him a vision of what awaits him, that is why he was able to wait for the right time.
The video was also good... and it brought home the reality to my heart that here on earth we are waiting for our turn. We can wait patiently for what is to come.
I know your life is not easy, but the stories you share with us on your blog are so important to hear. God is building your character through experiences that are unique to each one of us, but the lessons we learn are the same. Only the circumstances are different.
You are a blessing to me, Rosel.
Love
Lidj
My Sweet Sister,
ReplyDeleteYou had such a beautiful time with your dad despite what he was going through physically. He knew and God spoke through Him. Yes it is truly worth the wait.
Your whole post and the video...spokes tremendous volume to my mind and heart. I'm so happy that I came here early this morning for you have blessed me in so many ways today. I know you miss your mom and dad, but we know they are in a far better place now with our Heavenly Father. What JOY that brings to my heart.
I love you Rosel.
{{{Big Hugs}}}
Alleluiabelle
Beautiful, and...astounding! Yes, astounding. Your dad revealed Christ's heart in his last breath. I think the reason God doesn't take us quickly, even when we beg Him to, is because if He takes us in the state we're in, we may not be taken to that glorious place. He waits...He waits until we have forgiven each and every person who has afflicted us. And only then will we make it to the promised land. God's love is like no other. What a mighty King we serve!
ReplyDeleteRosel,
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful tribute and memory of those final moments with your father. Truly I believe that God's will and purpose for all of us is perfect in His timing and worth the wait no matter what the cost. The reward in the end is worth it all. Beautiful video!
Love and Hugs ~ Kat
Rosel,
ReplyDeleteOn the one hand this was a sad post for you and your siblings. I'm sorry. But from another perspective, what a comforting post! I hope I have your dad's faith at that final moment! And how neat his comments about forgiveness in light of the post I just wrote. Thanks for this story. wb
Thank you for sharing this Rosel. It brought tears to my eyes for you & your brothers' pain. But you also brought comfort; I am so grateful that indeed, we are not as those without hope. That we look forward when we are all together and worshiping God for all eternity.
ReplyDeleteYour story made me cry. How wonderful to know you will be with him again in heaven.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful story of faith in the Lord. So wonderful he had conversations with the Lord and was accepted into Gods kingdom.
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I had experienced a similar story with my mother in law when she passed on years ago.
what an amazing relationship you had with your dad. Thanks for sharing this window into your world....a window that showed a true family bond and a loving dad....a window that reminds me there are some good parents in the world who did the right thing...raised the best kids b/c they were the best. Hugs. Sarah
ReplyDeleteOh Rosel.....I am sobbing. What a beautiful story.....thank you for sharing this, and your Dad with us.
ReplyDelete"And the depression he had gone through after half of his heart departed [my mother], was replaced by the joy that came from knowing His Savior."
.....this took my breath away!
So grateful that God brought our paths together...
Rosel,
ReplyDeleteThis post had me in the grips of the emotion displayed here from the very start. I can not even imagine losing my dad yet. I am so sorry for your loss and yet so happy that you have the reassurance of His eternity. I pray that this post continues to bless so many people. You are amazing!
Christy