Find The Way Of The Lord

I found the Clinic almost empty except for one person whose work was equivalent to being a medical secretary. I had just walked in and was prepared to tackle another night of work.


“Where’s everyone?” I asked that coworker.


“They had a Code Blue [a code meaning the nurses are trying to revive an unconscious person] few minutes earlier before you walked in,” he replied.


“Was it Mr. O?” I wondered.


“Who’s Mr. O?”


“Remember? He would always play around with staff, claiming that he swallowed razor blades? He was unpredictable. We would send him to the hospital and x-rays would show no razor. Other times, he did swallow one. He was in and out of the jail’s Suicide Watch.”


“Yeah, yeah! I remember him now.”


The sheepish smile was widely painted on this young man’s face. The look on his eyes always beamed with pride that he would always have things his way, no matter what. Nurses couldn’t do anything, he knew. That even if his claim that he swallowed razor blades were false, the nurses had no choice but to send him out to the hospital. He seemed to have enjoyed those frequent trips. But most of all, he enjoyed getting things done his way!


His psychiatric medications were constantly changed, adjusted to his level of moods and behaviors. But every time, Mr. O always claimed he did something to try to hurt himself. The medications seemed to not have reached its full potential to help his mental state.


That night was not a unique one. It was another typical night of him playing around with his own life. He reassured the deputy from that unit that he wouldn’t do such a foolish thing. But it was the duty of deputies to check often cell per cell, every hour.


The body was motionless. [Pardon me friends, I wouldn’t write the manner of how he did it]. The deputy frantically called over the radio for a “Code Blue”. The Clinic was only across from that unit’s hallway. But their effort that was going on for a few minutes, almost an hour before I entered my workplace, remained futile.

He finally had it his way. And it resulted to a devastating loss. He was a young man, whose life was ruined by the use of drugs. His mental capabilities deteriorated over time.


God only knew if he meant to just play around, like the usual. But this time, he couldn’t get out of his own scheme.


How many of us are the same? Wanting to do everything with our own strength and effort - having things done our way, not God’s way? Doing so, most of the time, leads to a DISASTER! Stop now while you can!

Proverbs 3:5,6 -"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will direct your paths."