Into Your Hands

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath beforehand ordained, that we should walk in them. - Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither—whatever they do prospers. 

- Psalm 1:1-3 (NIV)

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. - 2 Timothy 2:15 (NIV)

If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am, there will my servant be also. If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him. - John 12:26 (ESV)

My husband and I started laughing so hard . The anticipated text came in to both of our cell phones.

Breathing a sigh of relief, as our laughter echoed in the whole family room, we read the same text that read “I’m okay.” It was from our son. Away for a night and 2 days. A mandatory orientation in the college where he was supposed to go this Fall. 

As a mother, that night seemed the longest. As I cracked open the dark room. My son’s bedroom. The smell of freshly washed sheets wafted, coming softly to my nostrils. The silhouette of his art slightly visible on the walls. There was only one missing…

My son…Our son…

And how my husband and I missed him last night. He had been good about updating us with what was going on in his orientation. I knew he was excited. As he started taking each step into discovering new adventures. 

Our son… 

Who used to steer his Fischer Price car as his feet propelled it fast then suddenly made a quick turn, making it glide in a precise circle in our living rooms. Its vinyl-tiled floors, which my husband and I installed in our old house, scratched with glistening white streak marks from his “pretend car’s black wheels.” Yes, that toddler who enjoyed the bubble baths…Took pictures with theme parks’ characters…Made little pancakes on Saturdays with his daddy…Counting with his numbers…Drawing or sketching with his markers…Who gave unexpected hugs and sweet kisses…

Now…A grown-up man…

The gnawing fear in a mother’s heart from his separation slowly disappeared…as waves of thoughts flooded this mother’s heart…Waves of merciful grace that reminded me every time I wanted to be faithless that I should be strong instead…Because He has better plans…As He always did no matter what trial my husband and I had gone through. He always sustained us both with His grace, love, and strength…

I slept…without worries…Knowing that despite it would be hard to let our son go and step out into this place filled with uncertain things, he would be okay…Knowing that my husband and I would be letting him go…Into His Hands…

“I’m okay…Good morning…Luvu…” my son texted to us this morning. I smiled and knew Who to thank right away for my son’s protection. No doubt. He would be starting a life of discoveries, meeting new friends and challenges…And I prayed…That he wouldn’t forget the Hands that hold him close. The Hands that never stopped serving when He was here. And my son, being His child, I prayed would always follow. A life of being a servant…A humble servant…in the days to come...

Lord, I pray…for us, as a family…to never stop loving You and remembering Your goodness all the days of our lives. Lord, help us surrender everything in our lives daily to You. Please use us as Your instruments for Your glory. Thank You Lord that You are always there for us, never leaving us especially at times of trials where our faiths are being tested. Please protect us. Comfort my husband’s and my heart as we let go of our dearest son into this world. But we both realize, we are letting him go into Your Hands that will wipe out our fears. As our son begins his life of service for You. May he bless many that You bring into his life and that You alone, are always glorified. Thank You Lord for everything. Thank You for Your love and mercy. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Faith...Even If It's Small...

"You don't have enough faith," Jesus told them. "I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it would move. Nothing would be impossible." – Matthew 17:20 (NLT)

Her words I sort of expected. But at the same time, I was hurting knowing my friend who recently injured her left foot needed the equipment the doctor ordered to help her ambulate than crutches. 

“She denied it,” she gasped, sensing her astonishment and anger at the same time. Anger that slowly built up as she waited for the equipment to be issued. Day after day. For weeks. She was talking about the Work Comp insurance person who dealt with her case.

“I’m not surprised,” I answered.

As I remembered clearly at the same time I was conversing with her, that I, had gone through the same trial when I hurt my neck in 1997 in the busy Orthopedic floor where we both worked before. I knew, like her, I didn’t want to deal with any hassles. I just wanted to be treated until I could get better and go back to the same work I had been doing for almost 10 years at that time. But my neck pain never improved. Every time I was there, the burden of caring for joint patients became too heavy for me. My neck pain always was aggravated every time I was barely starting my shift. Until I was able to make the transition to Correctional Nursing in year 2000. 

Looking back…I knew it was God Who coordinated my transfer. I vividly could hear what the treating doctor told me:

“Get out of Nursing…”

She started sobbing. I remained silent. I could feel the weight in her heart with all the things she had been going through. Hurting her foot was not even half of what she had to face daily. 

She faced mountain after mountain of trials. I might not have been in the same shoes she has…But I had been there. I truly understood from my heart. All the mountains of heartaches and frustrations I had to face. And learned to overcome. The buckets of tears I shed. The many faces I dealt with who seemed to not believe in my injury. No one understood at that time. For what I had gone through. Except one.

Jesus…

And I knew…despite the mountains I had to conquer, His promises always rang true. Of how He would always be there for me. Because He had gone before me. He suffered before me. He did…Because He loved me…As He loved all. 

And every time I conquered each mountain, every miraculous strength and triumph, it was because He made me learn…That by faith, I could. 

Even if that faith is as small as a “mustard seed.”

Faith that distrusts self-reliance…And faith that is laden with fervent prayers that should be presented to the foot of the cross…Where there, Christ’s arms had always been open…To accept a broken heart…

Jesus responded, "Didn't I tell you that you would see God's glory if you believe?" – John 11:40 (NLT)

"What do you mean, 'If I can'?" Jesus asked. "Anything is possible if a person believes."

– Mark 9:23 (NLT)