I always see this particular inmate every night, complaining of any ailment. The first time I saw her to treat her, her excuse that her ears were bleeding were not valid. When she came to the clinic inside the prison where I work, her story changed. She asked me if it was okay for her to be moved to a particular unit where they usually house those with mental health issues. It was because she heard it from a friend before her incarceration. Thinking that they get a better treatment, everyone wants to go there without knowing the specific reasons why such group of inmates get that "treatment", not knowing that those people needed it to help them overcome and improve their mental health problems...So, since she couldn't get it her way, she comes down to the clinic with any little complaint and at night, she makes it sound like something big was wrong so she won't be denied to be seen by the medical staff.
She said, "Well, I still bite my tongue." But she didn't know that prior to her coming down, I already read her chart and found out that she had been refusing her medications. On her own, she thought the medications were not working when the doctor just started her on them. I told her to stick out her tongue and didn't see any cuts or any potential problems. But I advised her that I know she had been refusing her meds and if she wanted to give them a try, give it some time for the medications to work. And she couldn't look me in the eye when I said that.
I was trying to be patient at all times and praying that I won't lose it, just like last night when she complained of bleeding ears and there was none. Calmly, I explained to her that such medical issues not requiring emergency treatment could have waited until the morning when the morning nurses do the sick call in their specific units. [If there was a true emergency from others, she was pulling me away from responding to that, since I had to deal with her]. I told her that all her medical and mental issues were already properly addressed and treated by our medical doctors and psych doctors. But there was no way I could tell her the specific reasons when we put someone in that unit she wanted to go to for the reason that she would start acting them out. I told her, she must be patient on her own, to wait until the prescribed medications start working for her and to follow what the doctors tell her in order for her to improve. She must not go by what she heard from her friend outside and the doctors know if she would need such placement if it would be appropriate by then. She said, "okay, thank you..."
In no distress, she would request right away to be sent back to her unit when she couldn't get anything that she wanted. But I know, she might be back again tonight.
Such scenario reminds me of how we act like that particular inmate towards our God. We are impatient when we don't get things [or plans] our way! Sometimes, we even get angry when He doesn't answer our prayers. We don't seem to trust that our God knows what's best for us. We keep bugging Him [or maybe not! when we lose our desire to communicate with Him] and start refusing to call on Him just like how that inmate started refusing the medications that might have help her in the first place.
Unlike me having the potential to lose my patience, God has never-ending patience. He is waiting for us to call on Him, have faith in Him, accept Him in our hearts and obey what He wants for our lives. He is our future! It is impossible to please God when we don't have faith in Him. Let's stop acting like we know what to do when achieving our plans. Then, we always end up worrying about our future....God knows best!!!
From the Holy Bible [New Century Version]:
Jeremiah 29:11 - "I say this because I know what I am planning for you," says the Lord. "I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future."1Corinthians 2:9 - "No one has ever seen this, and no one has ever imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him."Proverbs 16:1 - "People may make their plans in their minds, but only the Lord can make them come true."Proverbs 16:2 - "You may believe that you are doing right, but the Lord will judge your reasons."Proverbs 16:3 - "Depend on the Lord in whatever you do and your plans will succeed."Nehemiah 9:16, 17 - "But our ancestors were proud and stubborn and did not obey Your commands. They refused to listen; they forgot the miracles You did for them. So they became stubborn and turned against You, choosing a leader to take them back to slavery. But You are a forgiving God. You are kind and full of mercy. You do not become angry quickly, and You have great love. So You did not leave them."Isaiah 55:8, 9 - The Lord says, "My thoughts are not like your thoughts. Your ways are not like My ways. Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts are higher than your thoughts."