“Woohh…Someone hurry and give me a hand!” my voice echoing within the 4 corners of the tiny, waiting room on the female side of the Clinic. Three female inmates who just arrived for specific appointments with other medical staff stared at me and the downed inmate resting on the mattress the other nurse had provided. The resting inmate had a seizure prior in her unit to which one nurse responded and decided to keep her in our Infirmary so we could closely observe her and her seizures.
The shaking was so violent that I could feel the length of my arms and my legs getting numb and tired as they were also being shook as I tried to hold her head down, keep her on her side and make her body avoid hitting any part of the wall near her. The nurse who initially cared for her appeared and by the head dropped there and started holding her head for me.
The seizure must have lasted for approximately 3 minutes and it felt forever for everyone witnessing it. The inmate had gone in and out of consciousness but was able to respond as it stopped. Barely starting to assess her, another episode came. Her head jerking back and forth as I struggled so hard to keep it down and the other nurse switched position with me.
“Grab the emergency bag! The oxygen tank! Someone call for an ambulance!” both of us yelled to our other co-workers eager to help us with whatever they could.
As I called the ER doctor for an order of a medication to help calm her down, other nurses started the IV to which the medication was given immediately.
“She’s on her way soon,” I advised the doctor, whose name I only knew because of the many times I had called and consulted for urgent situations that needed his help.
The female inmate kept apologizing for her seizures. She got aware of the effort to save her but was embarrassed that she had even wet her prison-issued pants.
“Just rest. The ambulance is here,” we all reassured her and told her it would be okay. Knowing how limited our strength was to care for her, that was truly an unsure answer on our part. We said that because we all desired for her to stop having seizures and be well.
In the pages of history (Matthew 17:14-20), there was also a man, tired and desperate to find help for his son having seizures. Jesus’ disciples who were given power to heal were not able to heal his son from having seizures that caused the boy to fall into the fire or into the water. He suffered terribly. He approached Jesus when He and his disciples arrived at the foot of the mountain and asked for His mercy to heal his son.
Jesus said, "You faithless and corrupt people! How long must I be with you? How long must I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me." (Matthew 17:17). Jesus rebuked the demon in the boy and it left him. In that instant, the boy was healed.
When the disciples asked Jesus in private how come they were not able to heal the boy, Jesus replied that it was because they didn’t have enough faith.
Jesus came to heal. It must be frustrating for Him to see the unbelieving people. But what difference was it when even his own believing disciples might not have an increase amount of faith when they perform what God has given them to do?
I wasn't implying that the inmate had a demon in her but I felt so weak at that time after helping that inmate who had a seizure. I knew afterward, I relied on my own strength and forgot to call for His help. How could I when for all these years I had been working in the prison, I knew I was able to survive critical decision-making not by my own strength but because of faith and having trust in God’s power to intervene for me.
He never failed to be there for me. It is I who failed to trust in His power at that moment. I let the mountain of problem distract me and had my eyes focused on it, instead of focusing on the King of the Holy Mountain, Zion. It was me who let that obstacle hinder the flow of my faith. Forgive me Oh Lord and please increase my faith all the more!I know...I might not witness the way Jesus did His miraculous healing then but I believe...Jesus still heals today...as long as we approach Him with faith and trust. At the foot of the Mountain of the Living God, He is always ready to accept those who are willing to surrender all their worries and let His healing replace those.