In my email to one supervisor, I demanded to know why my claim for 8 hours from my holiday account was not approved and not paid. The rest of the hours were without pay as they had put me on a forced leave.
“I’m sorry…It was a mistake on our part…”
I read again and let it sank in. I could not believe that excuse. I knew it was intentional as their intimidation has not ceased at all. A part of a choreographed performance to make me miss my step and cause me to fall except I had discerned their steps way even before they performed some of them.
I carefully pulled the badge I was given 11 years ago and I stared at this golden emblem behind the rays of light penetrating the window covering. I pondered at the thought of how this perceived “authority” could change someone a great deal if not careful. The problem was not having this piece of shining metal with the word “Sheriff’s” embossed with a nice blue color and some also golden.
The problem was having empty minds, they let pride crept in and filled them like a dry well in desperate need of water. They also let evil intentions that arose from sinful nature to fill their empty hearts. I knew it too well as I lived that life before I came to the realization that nothing in this world can ever satisfy the needs of our hearts or minds except God’s love.
“Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. If your sinful nature controls your mind, there is death. But if the Holy Spirit controls your mind, there is life and peace. For the sinful nature is always hostile to God. It never did obey God’s laws and it never will. That’s why those who are still under the control of their sinful nature can never please God.” – Romans 8:5-8 (NLT)
“It’s only a badge…” I thought to myself.
“The authority it gives someone from work or myself can be taken away at any point. It just doesn’t last…”
|glancing at my badge...|
“Lord, I know where I stand. I know my true self-worth because of You.” I prayed as I felt some warm tears on my cheeks. Tears from mixed emotions. Tears of gratitude and tears of being tired of these people’s evil intentions. Though I was never afraid.
Holding my Bible close to my heart, I softly talked with Him in the stillness of the night, as my husband and son had been both asleep for a while.
It’s during quiet time like this, when I am chasing good-quality sleep and peaceful rest that I know the truth that an infinite, powerful Authority up above backs me up and strengthens me. The world declares I’m a loser. He says otherwise: “You’re a winner!” My Authority? His Name is Jesus…
"12 After washing their feet, he put on his robe again and sat down and asked, “Do you understand what I was doing? 13 You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and you are right, because that’s what I am. 14 And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet. 15 I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you. 16 I tell you the truth, slaves are not greater than their master. Nor is the messenger more important than the one who sends the message. 17 Now that you know these things, God will bless you for doing them." - John13:12-17 (NLT)