To Give Ears

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.” ~ Robert McCloskey

Three of us were slumped on our chairs last night. Everyone, including the Clinic Deputy, were all exhausted, explaining things to her but nothing was working.

In between loud sobs, a young female inmate demanded for so many requests every 5 minutes. Her face pressed on that big glass partition wall in the waiting area. She came in complaining of vaginal bleeding. 5 minutes later, she also had depression. 5 minutes later, she was also dizzy. 5 minutes later, her head hurts. 5 minutes later, she asked:

“If I hit my head in the bathroom, will you guys send me to the hospital?”

I just walked in to start my shift. The charge nurse was exhausted dealing with her and gave me her chart. She requested me to check her vital signs, whenever I was ready. While complaining to the deputy, I summoned her in. She kept talking the whole time. I only talked to her when I needed to. And concentrated on the things I needed to assess for. Her pulse and blood pressure and everything else were all normal. She denied a history of mental problem. She was at the earliest stage of being pregnant and complained of severe vaginal bleeding.

I told her to go to one of the exam rooms. As I had the Deputy stood nearby but enough to give the inmate some privacy.

“Show me your pad!” I demanded.

“What?” she acted not sure what I meant.

“Lower your pants and show me the pad they gave you earlier. If you are bleeding, I want to see how much!” I added.

There were no blood clots. There was no sign of any fresh, massive bleeding.

She didn’t know what to say. She started whining again in front of me.

“Can I stay here and wait here?” she asked, pertaining to the rows of chairs in front of the exam rooms.

“I’m sorry. I can’t let you stay here. We only bring you here if you are being treated. For now, you need to go back to the waiting area until we know that you’re feeling better, then, we’ll send you back to your unit,” I explained.

And for the ensuing hours, she remained whining, sobbing, yelling, demanding for treatment as she is a “high-risk” pregnant. She wouldn’t listen to our reassurance, to our explanations of her plan of care. She ended up being brought to the Suicide Watch because she threatened to hurt herself by hitting her head.

It was mentally exhausting. To try to explain things to someone who just didn’t want to listen.

“Are you okay?” asked the Charge Nurse.

“I’m fine. Just tired,” I answered as she laughed and concurred she felt the same. But my mind was somewhere else. Of the times God must have been longing for me to learn to listen. Except that He does not feel exhausted with my behavior. He always longs. He patiently waits. He watches faithfully. He always listens to me. To my whining…But how often do I listen to Him?

How it must be frustrating also for others who just want us to listen to them. Sometimes, it’s even better not to give any advices but just to let them know that we truly care and love them. By lending a pair of ears. A shoulder to cry on. How precious it would be to learn the art of listening. Of being still and remaining focused on what someone has to say. For the ability to speak well contributes to a successful communication. But so it is with the ability to listen…

Enough for me talking here….Go ahead, friends, your turn to speak!!! I need to listen!


James 1:19 - “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry…”

17 comments:

  1. I loved you opening quote by Robert McCloskey

    Thanks for the excellent reminder why God gave us two ears and only one mouth. Being a good listener is a learned skill that most of us don't have.

    Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue. Proverbs 17:8

    ReplyDelete
  2. This was really good as always. It is sometimes soo difficult to JUST listen. I do want to swope in and solve or fix things when I can, but often times what we REALLY need to do it listen. Thanks for this reminder. Have a great day...Blessings...

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm learning this, slowly but surely sister. But I love when God sends gentle reminders.

    May God bless you so richly today and everyday!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AMEN!!
    Now, I know why I had you on my mind so much this weekend. GOD BLESS you for all you do for HIM in the prison system. What an amazing ministry HE has given you.
    Praying you rest in HIS arms, this day!
    Hugs, andrea

    ReplyDelete
  5. Good advice: Be still and know. I hope you have a wonderful week! God bless you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I want to be a better listener. I can totally relate to what Debbie said here about how it's challenging to JUST listen

    ReplyDelete
  7. Bless you friend for dealing with these situations and not jumping out a window but use the situation as a teaching tool.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Rosel,

    I am so encouraged by your posts because you really make sure great points in our personal relationships with our Father. Too often, I am that whining child but I am learning to go to Him first and then deal with His will for me instead of my own.

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hi Rosel,
    Thanks so much for your wonderful love filled words. I was truly impacted by that video in ways that I can not explain. I have shared it with so many people. I cant believe that I almost did not hit play!
    Listen, I can do that. I can listen. I am lacking in many words lately anyways.
    Please please please stay safe. My prayers are with you.
    Love, Cherie

    ReplyDelete
  10. Great post. Loved the video.
    Love to you
    kelly

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh my friend, I felt like I was with you while listening to you tell us of this experience with this woman. May God cover you dear sister with so much grace and peace while working in such a place. May He wrap His arms around you and shelter you from all harm. May He whisper in your ear, "Job well done". May He continue to comfort those you deal with through you as you are such a strong shining vessel of His here on this earth.

    I love you Rosel. Oh how I pray for so much peace to cover you there in all ways.

    Peace to you my sweet friend & praying always for you,
    Alleluiabelle

    ReplyDelete
  12. I love you sis, and pray for you always. Thanks for being the blessing that you are.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Rosel, you are a wonderful sister and a blessing in your workplace :)


    ~Silver

    ReplyDelete
  14. Rosel,
    Thank you my sister in Christ for being HIS tool, for serving HIM and for allowing us to share in your journey.
    Your sister in Christ,
    Bren

    ReplyDelete
  15. Wow.....something I totally struggle with. Needing to just listen sometime, rather than always trying to "fix" the issue.

    I pray for your safety in your job often.

    xox

    ReplyDelete
  16. Godly inter-personal relationships require the critical element of listen. It is an skill and few are gifted, so the rest of us are learning and improving through the school of life's experiences. Thank you for bring this essential piece of communication that each and every one of us can use daily in our walk with the Lord through this world with joy. Brian

    ReplyDelete

"Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase..."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

All posts/composed songs copyright by RCUBEs.



Encouragers

GotQuestions?org

Friends