Mind Your Own Business



I have been job sharing with one of my co-workers for many years now. When I started working at the jail, my child was only 5 years old then. He’s 14 now. You would think that I would go back working full time. But I truly enjoy my time raising my son and taking care of my hubby’s and child’s needs. In their teenage years, I believe that’s the most important time of guidance and sharing the Lord with them at these awkward years. They feel like they are grown-ups, yet, they still have not completely left their childhood years. They are still dependent with some things.


It’s amazing to me how co-workers are constantly teasing me about adding more work hours or making comments that my son now is big, why be there [for him]? I try to tell them answers that are not mean but let’s just say in a much better way than saying “it’s none of your business…”


Working this weekend, one really got to me when she spoke, “Why? Why do you bring your kid to school? He’s big now. Maybe he doesn’t want you to be there. He just doesn’t want to tell you because he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings?”

My first reaction in my mind? Prayer….”Lord, thank You for changing me. If You didn’t change my heart, I would have responded in a mean way to make this person zip her mouth…”


My answer? “I think I know MY son well enough that I will know whether he likes me to drive him to school or pick him up or not!”


S…I…L…E…N…C…E…..


She went back to typing whatever in front of the computer monitor. Topics suddenly changed…


I love the wisdom that comes from the Lord. Short but very sharp. So sharp that even one sentence was enough to make your point!!!


I would love to ask that co-worker some of my own but decided not to….I had so much if I did…

“Does working a lot of hours improve our relationships with our children?”

We may earn a lot of money, but is it all worth it than the times well-spent talking with our children, seeing their accomplishments, being there for them when they encounter their own defeats and losses as our kids meet new challenges in their lives?

“What makes you think that my child doesn’t want me to drop him off and pick him up at school?”

Everyday, I won’t trade with anything our breakfasts together, preparing his lunch and snacks, our devotions together, lifting up everyone we know in prayers. The way he says, “thank You Lord! Thank you Mom! [or thank you dad if my husband is home] as his warm kisses land on our cheeks along with his hugs, after eating each meals….

Oh no! I won’t miss it for anything the way he waves his right arm “goodbye” as he says, “I love you mommy! See you later!” How can I want to miss picking him up when the first thing my child asks as he gets into the car, “Hi Mom! How are you? How was your day?” To know that deep inside, he loves and cares for me and he appreciates the things I do, how does my co-worker know that?

“He’s big now..Yes, I know…But what makes you think that just because he had grown up a little and had known a little, he became a disrespectful half-man/half-child?”


No! You must know that if we keep teaching our children about the Lord, that if we instill His grace and knowledge, He changes our children‘s hearts, too, the way He changed mine and that of my husband‘s. Just this morning, I shared with him Galatians 5:22. Aside from starting each morning with Proverbs 3:5,6. The world or generation may seem the same, always hungry for what this world offers or are always thinking about themselves first, but the generation that believes in Christ do not always go with the flow. Instilling in our children to have that reverential fear of the Lord changes their hearts and as they also learn to trust in Him and read his Word, I just know, I do not need to worry about my child, if I place my worries to God's loving hands, to God's guidance, to God's protection...Don't get me wrong! I'm not trying to say that Christians are the best. No! We can also succumb to our old habits if we are not relying on Christ. It doesn't mean our children are well-behaved...It is only Christ Who can change a person's heart. And if we expose our children to His love and grace, that's what works, not our own achievements.

“Train your child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” -Proverbs 22:6 [NIV]

My response to my co-worker’s statement: Nothing….But to mind my own business…I have nothing against working full time. It is because it depends on our financial status and life’s priorities. My only point is that we cannot apply what situations we are facing with others. I think every family is unique, just the way each of us is unique to God. I have no one to thank but God because as I had learned to walk closer with Him, He changed my heart. He changed my priorities. I learned to live in contentment. I learned to prioritize of what matters the most…I learned to live in simple ways. It’s an on-going learning process…And how I love the simplicity that comes from Jesus Christ!

Let me just put God’s advice [1 Thessalonians 4:11]:

“Stay calm; mind your own business; do your own job. You’ve heard all this from us before, but a reminder never hurts. We want you living in a way that will command the respect of outsiders, not lying around sponging off your friends.” - The Message


“Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” - NIV

“Try your best to live quietly, to mind your own business, and to work hard, just as we taught you to do. Then you will be respected by people who are not followers of the Lord , and you won’t have to depend on anyone.” -CEV

11 comments:

  1. I appreciate your post. I got a lot of flak at work about my time with my kids as well. But we each have to live our own life as God directs us individually (of course my co-workers weren't Christian so they wouldn't have understood that either). I've never regretted a moment of the time I've invested in the 3 sons God's blessed me with.

    Love the way 1 Thessalonians 4:11 reads in the message.

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  2. People really don't understand or recognize when parents choose to be involved and "want" to be there for their kids no matter their age. I think it is just as important to be there for our kids when they are older as when they are young! The Lord doesn't say teach your children in the way they should go only until they are 10 ;) does HE?

    I wonder what your co-worker is dealing with that she would voice her opinion against this so strongly.....maybe she is hurt bc her parents didn't do this for her? maybe she is jealous of your time to be with your family and doesn't have the relationship with her kids that way ....who knows but I know you have a heart of compassion and the LORD will show you!
    I love you Rosel and thankyou for your comments today. My husband and I were blessed to be a part of the Fireproof group way before it ever came out (onscreen or in print) and it was an awesome journey! I have recommended it to many couples and they are amazed at the changes in their relationships! I will pray for you all and KNOW you will finish strong!

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  3. Rosel,

    Congratulations for you still being an active parent in your son's life. Too often so many parents are missing in their childs life and then wonder why they act the way they do or are involved with the wrong group of people. As long as my kids want me in their lives, I will step up and be the parent I was called to be. Until then, I will pray for God's calling in their lives and safety when we are apart from one another.

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat

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  4. You hold on tightly to that wisdom He has placed within you and continue seeking it out, because you are right on with all of this :)

    Amen!! and I'll say it again...AMEN!!

    I also go right to Him when I've been swept into a defensive situation...oh, yes..there are many things we'd like to spurt out but thankfully, His Spirit so gently calms our heart long enough to gain composure within and say..."Oh Lord ♥"

    Love to you.

    Glad you've posted this...very much :)

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  5. There is the world's wisdom and God's wisdom. Thank you for nurturing your son in such Godly wisdom. He will grow up to be a Godly man! We need Godly men! You handled that well!

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  6. As always, your posts are oozing with wisdom Rosel. I'm glad God gave you the words to stay to your coworker. I need to be more like that, slow to speak, quick to listen.

    Bless you sweet Sister!
    Beth

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  7. I think that is wonderful the way your son responds to you. You are doing the right thing for sure. And that was great the way you answered your co worker.

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  8. I think it is wonderful you can spend the time with your children. Good for YOU!

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  9. Bless you for always listening with your heart, as well as your ears. I love you.

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  10. Powerful post. Great you stood up! God will direct you dear one. Thank you for sharing! Blessings.

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  11. Rosel, It is so easy to think that when our kids start to get as big as us on the outside that they need us less in their life. That is so much a lie from the source of all lies. Some times I think our teens need us more then than ever. And, they may not tell us that with words but if we will look back and remember the thoughts and feelings that we all had at that age deep inside, we will know how searching their hearts are. They need their parents long after they begin to look adult like on the outside. And, as we step up and continue to love and parent them, they will respond with love and respect in return, as you so beautifully communicated in this post.

    Thanks for sharing this. It was a great reminder for me.
    Christy

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"Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase..."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

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