Mind Your Own Business



I have been job sharing with one of my co-workers for many years now. When I started working at the jail, my child was only 5 years old then. He’s 14 now. You would think that I would go back working full time. But I truly enjoy my time raising my son and taking care of my hubby’s and child’s needs. In their teenage years, I believe that’s the most important time of guidance and sharing the Lord with them at these awkward years. They feel like they are grown-ups, yet, they still have not completely left their childhood years. They are still dependent with some things.


It’s amazing to me how co-workers are constantly teasing me about adding more work hours or making comments that my son now is big, why be there [for him]? I try to tell them answers that are not mean but let’s just say in a much better way than saying “it’s none of your business…”


Working this weekend, one really got to me when she spoke, “Why? Why do you bring your kid to school? He’s big now. Maybe he doesn’t want you to be there. He just doesn’t want to tell you because he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings?”

My first reaction in my mind? Prayer….”Lord, thank You for changing me. If You didn’t change my heart, I would have responded in a mean way to make this person zip her mouth…”


My answer? “I think I know MY son well enough that I will know whether he likes me to drive him to school or pick him up or not!”


S…I…L…E…N…C…E…..


She went back to typing whatever in front of the computer monitor. Topics suddenly changed…


I love the wisdom that comes from the Lord. Short but very sharp. So sharp that even one sentence was enough to make your point!!!


I would love to ask that co-worker some of my own but decided not to….I had so much if I did…

“Does working a lot of hours improve our relationships with our children?”

We may earn a lot of money, but is it all worth it than the times well-spent talking with our children, seeing their accomplishments, being there for them when they encounter their own defeats and losses as our kids meet new challenges in their lives?

“What makes you think that my child doesn’t want me to drop him off and pick him up at school?”

Everyday, I won’t trade with anything our breakfasts together, preparing his lunch and snacks, our devotions together, lifting up everyone we know in prayers. The way he says, “thank You Lord! Thank you Mom! [or thank you dad if my husband is home] as his warm kisses land on our cheeks along with his hugs, after eating each meals….

Oh no! I won’t miss it for anything the way he waves his right arm “goodbye” as he says, “I love you mommy! See you later!” How can I want to miss picking him up when the first thing my child asks as he gets into the car, “Hi Mom! How are you? How was your day?” To know that deep inside, he loves and cares for me and he appreciates the things I do, how does my co-worker know that?

“He’s big now..Yes, I know…But what makes you think that just because he had grown up a little and had known a little, he became a disrespectful half-man/half-child?”


No! You must know that if we keep teaching our children about the Lord, that if we instill His grace and knowledge, He changes our children‘s hearts, too, the way He changed mine and that of my husband‘s. Just this morning, I shared with him Galatians 5:22. Aside from starting each morning with Proverbs 3:5,6. The world or generation may seem the same, always hungry for what this world offers or are always thinking about themselves first, but the generation that believes in Christ do not always go with the flow. Instilling in our children to have that reverential fear of the Lord changes their hearts and as they also learn to trust in Him and read his Word, I just know, I do not need to worry about my child, if I place my worries to God's loving hands, to God's guidance, to God's protection...Don't get me wrong! I'm not trying to say that Christians are the best. No! We can also succumb to our old habits if we are not relying on Christ. It doesn't mean our children are well-behaved...It is only Christ Who can change a person's heart. And if we expose our children to His love and grace, that's what works, not our own achievements.

“Train your child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” -Proverbs 22:6 [NIV]

My response to my co-worker’s statement: Nothing….But to mind my own business…I have nothing against working full time. It is because it depends on our financial status and life’s priorities. My only point is that we cannot apply what situations we are facing with others. I think every family is unique, just the way each of us is unique to God. I have no one to thank but God because as I had learned to walk closer with Him, He changed my heart. He changed my priorities. I learned to live in contentment. I learned to prioritize of what matters the most…I learned to live in simple ways. It’s an on-going learning process…And how I love the simplicity that comes from Jesus Christ!

Let me just put God’s advice [1 Thessalonians 4:11]:

“Stay calm; mind your own business; do your own job. You’ve heard all this from us before, but a reminder never hurts. We want you living in a way that will command the respect of outsiders, not lying around sponging off your friends.” - The Message


“Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” - NIV

“Try your best to live quietly, to mind your own business, and to work hard, just as we taught you to do. Then you will be respected by people who are not followers of the Lord , and you won’t have to depend on anyone.” -CEV

11 comments:

  1. I appreciate your post. I got a lot of flak at work about my time with my kids as well. But we each have to live our own life as God directs us individually (of course my co-workers weren't Christian so they wouldn't have understood that either). I've never regretted a moment of the time I've invested in the 3 sons God's blessed me with.

    Love the way 1 Thessalonians 4:11 reads in the message.

    ReplyDelete
  2. People really don't understand or recognize when parents choose to be involved and "want" to be there for their kids no matter their age. I think it is just as important to be there for our kids when they are older as when they are young! The Lord doesn't say teach your children in the way they should go only until they are 10 ;) does HE?

    I wonder what your co-worker is dealing with that she would voice her opinion against this so strongly.....maybe she is hurt bc her parents didn't do this for her? maybe she is jealous of your time to be with your family and doesn't have the relationship with her kids that way ....who knows but I know you have a heart of compassion and the LORD will show you!
    I love you Rosel and thankyou for your comments today. My husband and I were blessed to be a part of the Fireproof group way before it ever came out (onscreen or in print) and it was an awesome journey! I have recommended it to many couples and they are amazed at the changes in their relationships! I will pray for you all and KNOW you will finish strong!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Rosel,

    Congratulations for you still being an active parent in your son's life. Too often so many parents are missing in their childs life and then wonder why they act the way they do or are involved with the wrong group of people. As long as my kids want me in their lives, I will step up and be the parent I was called to be. Until then, I will pray for God's calling in their lives and safety when we are apart from one another.

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat

    ReplyDelete
  4. You hold on tightly to that wisdom He has placed within you and continue seeking it out, because you are right on with all of this :)

    Amen!! and I'll say it again...AMEN!!

    I also go right to Him when I've been swept into a defensive situation...oh, yes..there are many things we'd like to spurt out but thankfully, His Spirit so gently calms our heart long enough to gain composure within and say..."Oh Lord ♥"

    Love to you.

    Glad you've posted this...very much :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. There is the world's wisdom and God's wisdom. Thank you for nurturing your son in such Godly wisdom. He will grow up to be a Godly man! We need Godly men! You handled that well!

    ReplyDelete
  6. As always, your posts are oozing with wisdom Rosel. I'm glad God gave you the words to stay to your coworker. I need to be more like that, slow to speak, quick to listen.

    Bless you sweet Sister!
    Beth

    ReplyDelete
  7. I think that is wonderful the way your son responds to you. You are doing the right thing for sure. And that was great the way you answered your co worker.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I think it is wonderful you can spend the time with your children. Good for YOU!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Bless you for always listening with your heart, as well as your ears. I love you.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Powerful post. Great you stood up! God will direct you dear one. Thank you for sharing! Blessings.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Rosel, It is so easy to think that when our kids start to get as big as us on the outside that they need us less in their life. That is so much a lie from the source of all lies. Some times I think our teens need us more then than ever. And, they may not tell us that with words but if we will look back and remember the thoughts and feelings that we all had at that age deep inside, we will know how searching their hearts are. They need their parents long after they begin to look adult like on the outside. And, as we step up and continue to love and parent them, they will respond with love and respect in return, as you so beautifully communicated in this post.

    Thanks for sharing this. It was a great reminder for me.
    Christy

    ReplyDelete

"Faith is taking the first step even if you don't see the whole staircase..."
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

All posts/composed songs copyright by RCUBEs.



Encouragers

The Attacker (5/15/09)

The sun was just peeking from the Eastern skies. Ephesians 6:12 [37 kb]


Out in the prison’s yard, some huge Sheriff’s buses were illuminated by the soft glow coming from the lights all over from the tall lamp posts. Their engines were turned on, warming up, before the buses would take the inmates to the different courts where they would have their trials.


Orange-uniformed men were lined up in pairs, joined together with handcuffs and chained, forming a long line. They already had their breakfast and had their morning medications prior to going to courts. Some were fidgeting, as they waited to board those buses.


All of a sudden, all hell broke loose! Two men were engaged in a fight, using weapons they made secretly for a while. Deputies called for help on the radio, both for custody back-up and medical staff, as well.


When the air was cleared and the other inmates were secured, one man was down on the floor. He sustained multiple gashes but two of them were deep. One cut was vertically etched from his left ear going down to the jaw line. The other dangerous cut was horizontal on his left neck, close to the jugular vein. Pool of blood dripped all over the floor. Holding his bleeding neck, he was pointing at the other inmate few feet away, being guarded by the other deputies.


The other man being accused was not hurt. There were no lacerations nor any other signs of trauma. He was obviously very agitated as he was being questioned by those deputies, while the medical staff started treating the other man on the floor. They cleaned the wounds and controlled the bleeding. That man was sent to the nearby hospital.


When the investigation was finalized, it turned out to be that the “downed man who was accusing the other inmate” was the attacker and the other one who didn’t have injury was the one attacked. The deputies found out that it was the second attempt to attack the unhurt man. Both attacks on him failed. He was well-prepared after the first attempt on him, that when the second attempt was done, he was able to defend himseld and ended up injuring his attacker severely.


[Source: Life Application Bible]:


We also have an “accuser of the brethren.” Satan and his army of demons are the enemies of God and of everything good.


“Because God’s children are human beings – made of flesh and blood – Jesus also became flesh and blood by being born in human form. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the Devil, who had the power of death.” –Hebrews 2:14


Because of what Jesus had done [dying on the cross], we, who live in constant fear of death shouldn’t be afraid anymore. Jesus had freed us from that fear so we can live for Him. When we belong to God, we know that death is only the portal that leads into “eternal life”. [“Thank You Lord!].


Paul warned us, too that we also battle against the evil forces of Satan, who is a vicious fighter. But to be able to withstand their attacks, we must depend on God’s strength and use every piece of His armor. We face an army whose goal is to defeat Christ’s church. When we believe in Christ, they become our enemies. They will try any device to turn us away from the Lord.


Fear not! For God has provided His supernatural power to defeat Satan and his army, through His Holy Spirit within us. So, arm yourselves with God’s armor.


Let us be strong in the Lord's mighty power. Let's put on His whole armor to resist the enemy's attacks: put on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God's righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that we are well-prepared. We will need faith in every battle as our shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed by Satan and his army. Let us put on salvation as our helmet, not forgetting the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. Let's pray at all times, on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. We must stay alert and be persistent in our prayers for all Christians everywhere. [Ephesians 6:10-18].

Friends